#monosexism

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unicorn-march:

unicorn-march:

Unicorn March is all about pride for the most forgotten and endangered parts of the community. 

Sometimes, pride means knowing more about the struggles that people like you face. Pride from within, from knowing what you’re surviving. Pride from other community members and outsiders, supporting you and loving you for what you are, not just what you overcome. 

This infographic collects all the current data on ace-spec oppression into one thread. (It exceeds Tumblr’s image limit, so if you’re only seeing the first post, check the notes for the rest.) Feel free to save any of these images to share. Tag @unicorn-march if you can, when you use these in a reply or your own posts; it would be great to see how this info helps people. Image descriptions are in the alt tags. 

[Dark purple background with large white text that says 'Unicorn March presents: What Aces Face,' followed by a small ace flag.]
[Dark purple background with large white text that says 'First, a few quick definitions.' Smaller white text below it says, 'The 'unicorns' of the LGBTQIPA+ community are groups that are rarely seen, and rarely supported. Asexuals, or 'aces,' aren't sexually attracted to men. Or women. Or any other genders.  Some aces can get turned on by the idea of enjoyable sex; some just don't enjoy it, or are repulsed by it. But they don't get turned on by people. The ace spectrum also includes people who are demisexual and grey-ace. Demis don't experience sexual attraction without deep emotional intimacy.  Most people go on first dates to see if they feel attraction; demis don't know if they'll ever feel it for a given person.']
[White text here continues from the previous image: 'Like many grey areas, 'grey-ace' covers a lot of territory. Grey-aces identify with the experiences shared overall by the ace community. But they might feel unsure about whether they sometimes experience sexual attraction. They may experience it only vaguely, conditionally, or, like many demis, very, very rarely. Or they may experience some sort of sexual attraction, but not any particular drive or interest in sex. The beauty of the grey-ace label is that people can connect to the ace-spec community without having to put their reasons into words. If that sounds confusing, try assuming you're experiencing attraction, when really you just want, very much, to date someone. Or thinking you must be bi or pan, because you experience the same amount of (or lack of) attraction to all genders. Or distinguishing between sexual attraction to people, and free-floating sexual arousal in general. Most of us assume that if we have any sex drive at all, it must mean we're attracted to people. But there's a difference... and even when we don't notice the difference, it has an impact on our lives.']
[Black text on a grey background says In The WorkplACE. The letters ACE are in the rest of the ace pride flag colors: white, grey, and purple. Below this header is an explanation of the bar graph following it: 'The white columns show the percent of each group, at work, that experiences verbal harassment, exclusion from activities, being nonconsensually outed, the threat or act of physical or sexual harassment or violence, or other inappropriate comments or conduct.  In order to avoid counting sexual minorities who are harassed for being trans, these numbers are only for cis sexual minorities. Transgender responses were consistently higher: a full third of heterosexual trans people reported similar experiences.' The chart shows that 19.3% of gay people were harassed at work, 23.3% of bisexuals, 28.6% of pansexuals, 29% of aces, and 27.1% of queer people. Additional dark and light purple bars alongside the white bars show stats for cis and trans people living in poverty. Among cis people, 37.7% of gay people in the UK are living in poverty; 59% of bisexuals; 65.2% of pansexuals; 64% of aces; and 57.3% of queer people. Among trans people, 57.9% of gay people live in poverty; 60.5% of bisexuals; 66.2% of pansexuals; 64.8% of aces; and 64.7% of queer people. Black text below this chart gives the source of the data as 'Government Equalities Office, 2017, National LGBT Survey.']
[This page features a purple background and a central white square with the text, 'Barriers To Education: In 2015, the Association of American Universities surveyed more than 150,000 students nationwide about some of the challenges they might have been experiencing. These statistics are from their time in college and graduate school only.' Around this are four sections, with greyscale squares in different sizes showing the statistics for each group. From the top of the page, proceeding clockwise around it: 60.4% of gay/lesbians, 64% of aces, and 69.1% of bisexuals experience harassment during college and graduate school. 10.8% of straight students, 13.7% of gay/lesbian, 18.3% of ace, and 25.6% of bi students experience violent assault. 3.7% of straight, 5.9% of gay, 9.5% of ace, and 9.9% of bi students experience stalking. and 5.2% of straight, 8.7% of gay, 13.5% of ace, and 14.4% of bi students experience nonconsensual touch. The bottom of the page gives the following source: Cantor, David, et al. 2015. AAU Climate Survey on Sexual Assault and Sexual Misconduct.]
[A light grey background, decorated with dots and circles in purple and white, with a white bar graph. Purple text reads, 'HOME SWEET HOME: The white columns show the percent of each group that at home, in the past year, experienced verbal harassment, insults, or other hurtful comments; coercive or controlling behavior; being nonconsensually outed; the threat or act of physical or sexual harassment or violence; or other inappropriate comments or conduct. In order to avoid counting sexual minorities who are abused for being trans, these numbers are only for cis sexual minorities. Transgender responses were consistently higher, but followed a similar pattern, ranging from 36.8% for heterosexuals to 58.9% for pansexuals.' Below this, the bar chart shows the percentages: 22.5% of gay people, 34.8% of bisexuals, 39.3% of pansexuals, 32.1% of queer people, 35.6% of aces, and 36.6% of people identifying in some other way. These stats are once again from the UK's national LGBT Survey in 2017.]
[A large, purple-edged, white speech bubble against a black background says, 'So-called conversion therapies, sometimes also referred to as cure, aversion or reparative therapies, are techniques intended to change someone’s sexual orientation or gender identity... commonly ranging from pseudo-psychological treatments to spiritual counselling. In extreme cases, they may also include surgical and hormonal interventions, or so-called ‘corrective’ rape.' The quote is attributed to 'The Rt. Hon. Penny Mordaunt and the Government Equalities Office. (2017) National LGBT Survey: Research Report.']
[A cherry-red megaphone against a purple background illustrates the stats for 'CONVERSION THERAPY.' A smaller subheader says, 'The least- studied asexual experience by far is also one of the most damaging -- and most common.' The page goes on to explain, 'In 2017, the UK's Government Equalities Office conducted the National LGBT Survey, which included more than 108,000 LGBTQIPA+ people. Their findings finally validated what aces had been saying for years: a wide swath of the world treats their sexual orientation as a disease to be 'cured.' By force, if necessary.' The megaphone is lined with bold black statistics: Bi, 5.2%. Pan, 6.6%. Gay, 7.6%. Ace, 10.2%. At the bottom, a smaller note says that 'Percentages are of cis people who have had, or been directed to, conversion therapy for their orientation. Trans responses are omitted here for clarity, as they could have been targeted for gender, orientation, or both.']
[White text on a black background says, 'HOMELESSNESS IS NOT AN EVENT: '...For LGBTQA youth, while disclosures of stigmatized sexual or gender identities typically did not instantly result in getting kicked out, it often arrived in the context of already stressed parent-child relationships and other parental and family struggles that were years in the making. 'Many of these youth eventually left in order to escape the stigma and discrimination they had endured within their families for quite some time. [They reported] some of the highest rates of adversity scores in our survey, often while stably housed.' Samuels, Gina E. Miranda, et al. (2019) Voices of Youth Count In-Depth Interviews: Technical Report.]
[White text on a purple background says, 'HOMELESSNESS: A higher likelihood of becoming homeless is one of the most socially visible effects of oppression. According to the national 2016-17 Voices Of Youth Count survey, 114% more homeless youth are on the ace spectrum than youth in the general population. 41% more are gay/lesbian; 50% more are bi; and 83% more are trans.' Below that, a grey bar chart on a white background shows these statistics, as well as showing that cis hetero youth are disproportionately less likely to become homeless.' Source: Chapin Hall at the University of Chicago. (2017) Youth Homelessness in San Diego County, California: Findings from the youth count, brief youth survey, and provider survey.]
[White text on a purple background says, 'In 2011, the National Transgender Discrimination Survey spoke with 6,450 trans people, creating a detailed portrait of transgender life. We all know the trans community struggles with very high homelessness rates. So high that even heterosexual trans people have the same likelihood of having been homeless at some point as their gay and bi transgender peers: around 19%. But if you're trans and ace? 27%.' Source: 'LGB Within the T,' The Williams Institute A grey bar chart on the right, against a white background, illustrates the statistics: 19% each for straight and gay trans people, 17% for bi trans people, and 27% for ace trans people.]
[Large white text on a black background says, 'If asexual people feel similar pressure to other sexual minorities to conform to heterosexual norms, then it is possible that they too may have elevated rates of mental health problems.' From Morag A. Yulea, Lori A. Brottob and Boris B. Gorzalkaa's 2011 paper, 'Mental Health and Interpersonal Functioning in Self-Identified Asexual Men and Women.']
[The header says, 'MENTAL HEALTH PROBLEMS: These are each group's mean scores on clinical assessments for depression and generalized anxiety disorder. GAD is diagnosed at scores of 10 or higher. Scores of 10-14 on the PHQ-9 indicate moderate depression.' Below this are greyscale stripes going from off-white to black. Each stripe has the name of a sexual orientation, followed by two emoji illustrating their average scores for clinical depression and anxiety disorders. Heterosexuals are illustrated with two smiley faces and the scores 6.15 anxiety, 6.99 depression. Gay Men and Lesbians have upside-down smiley faces, in the classic 'ha ha I'm screwed' emoji, and the scores 7.50 anxiety, 8.83 depression. The other four orientations have sad faces, illustrating scores approaching or above the clinical cutoff for these mood disorders: Bisexuals, 9.92 anxiety, 10.73 depression. Asexuals, 9.24 anxiety, 11.80 depression. Pansexuals, 10.13 anxiety, 12.37 depression. And demisexuals, 11.56 anxiety, 13.47 depression. A purple circle on the right contains the text 'Source: Borgogna, N. C., et al. 2018. Anxiety and Depression Across Gender and Sexual Minorities: Implications for Transgender, Gender Nonconforming, Pansexual, Demisexual, Asexual, Queer, and Questioning Individuals.']
[A black header against a broad purple background says, 'SUICIDALITY'. Below, in large white text, the number '26% of cis aces' stands out. It continues in smaller text, 'in a 2011 study had suicidal thoughts/feelings in the two weeks prior to the study, compared to 24% of cis LGB and 12% of cis straight subjects.' Source: 'Mental Health and Interpersonal Functioning in Self-Identified Asexual Men and Women,' Yulea, Brotto, & Gorzalska, 2011.]
[White text on a gray background says, 'Have you ever seriously considered suicide? 11% of cis straight people have thought about it at some point in their lives. So have 34% of cis gay and lesbian people, and 38% of cis bisexuals. 'In the cis ace community, that number jumps to 43.4%.' A purple bar graph to the right illustrates these numbers. Sources: Salway et al (2019). A Systematic Review and Meta‑Analysis of Disparities in the Prevalence of Suicide Ideation and Attempts Among Bisexual Populations, and Bauer et al (2016). The 2016 Asexual Community Survey Summary Report.]
[White text on a black background says, 'Asexual trans people have the highest rate of attempted suicide of all sexual orientations: a shocking 46%.' The number 46% is in large italic purple text. Smaller white italics continue, 'Remember, that statistic only measures those who attempted it. In one study of nearly 2,000 trans people aged 14-30, 95.5% of subjects reported having had suicidal thoughts and feelings at some point in their lives.' A purple bar chart to the right illustrates the statistics: 36% of hetero trans people, 40% of gay/lesbian trans people, 40% of bi+ trans people, and 46% of aces.' Sources: Grant, Jaime M. et al (2011). Injustice at every turn: A report of the National Transgender Discrimination Survey; and Kuper et al (2018). Exploring Cross-Sectional Predictors of Suicide Ideation, Attempt, and Risk in a Large Online Sample of Transgender and Gender Nonconforming Youth and Young Adults.]

Links to all the sources, in the order that they appear: 

UK Government Equalities Office. (2017) National LGBT Survey. Data from more than 108,000 LGBTQIPA+ people across the United Kingdom. You can review the data and crunch your own numbers by clicking “analyse” on their website! They also have a report which presents some of the data, and their commentary.

Cantor, David, et al. (2015) AAU Climate Survey on Sexual Assault and Sexual Misconduct. Data from more than 150,000 college and graduate students across the United States. 

Samuels, Gina E. Miranda, et al. (2019) Voices of Youth Count In-Depth Interviews: Technical Report. This is a 22-county study of 4,139 unhoused youth across the United States. They worked with local agencies, and were careful to include a mix of rural, suburban, and urban areas of varying densities and demographics. This report has a broad overview of their findings and recommendations. 

The in-depth data represented here comes from Chapin Hall at the University of Chicago. (2017) Youth Homelessness in San Diego County, California: Findings from the youth count, brief youth survey, and provider survey. Although that’s a San Diego-specific study, Appendix E provides the data from all 22 counties for comparison. 

The Williams Institute. (2016) LGB Within the T. This paper crunches the data from the 2011 National Transgender Discrimination Survey, which did in-depth interviews of 6,450 trans people of all orientations. 

Borgogna, N. C., et al. (2018) Anxiety and Depression Across Gender and Sexual Minorities: Implications for Transgender, Gender Nonconforming, Pansexual, Demisexual, Asexual, Queer, and Questioning Individuals. This paper crunches the data from the ACHA National College Health Assessment, a twice-yearly survey of (at last count) 67,972 students at 98 schools across the United States. 

Yulea, Brotto, & Gorzalska. (2011) Mental Health and Interpersonal Functioning in Self-Identified Asexual Men and Women. This is an older study, by comparison, and much smaller, so it’s used very sparingly here. 

Salway et al (2019). A Systematic Review and Meta‑Analysis of Disparities in the Prevalence of Suicide Ideation and Attempts Among Bisexual Populations. An extremely thorough analysis of the data available in 46 studies on LGBT suicidality, the reasons for different findings in different studies, and the most likely actual numbers. 

Bauer et al (2018). The 2016 Asexual Community Survey Summary Report. This is an ongoing annual online survey of major asexual communities; the 2016 survey received a total of 9,869 responses (Ace = 9331 and Non-Ace= 538). As it’s not a peer-reviewed published study, it’s used even more sparingly here; the only data used here from this report is the percentage of cis aces who had considered suicide. 

Grant, Jaime M. et al. 2011. Injustice at every turn: A report of the National Transgender Discrimination Survey. Further excellent analysis of the data from those 6,450 trans people.  

Kuper et al. 2018. Exploring Cross-Sectional Predictors of Suicide Ideation, Attempt, and Risk in a Large Online Sample of Transgender and Gender Nonconforming Youth and Young Adults. Crunches data from the largest sample to date of transgender and gender non-conforming young people, a geographically diverse group of 1,896 respondents ages 14-30. 

thefayth:

(all quotes taken from the publicly available City of West Hollywood Lesbian and Gay Advisory Board 11/12/15 minutes: http://binetusa.blogspot.com/…/bi-weho-city-council-event-j…)

“…if bisexual people want to have their own board, the City should do that, but that it would not be serving bisexual people well to have their issues combined with others.”

“…spoke against having a separate board, because younger people are moving toward not defining themselves in these ways…”

“…the Board could ask the City Council to begin a Bisexual Task Force.”

ED. NOTE. The LA Bi Task Force regularly holds events and meetings in West Hollywood. 

“…the Board is barely able to get through the agenda it already has, without adding an additional subject.”

“…moved to ask the City Council to consider whether there is a need to form a Bisexual Task Force to do a needs assessment of the bisexual community.”

ED. NOTE. The LA Bi Task Force published a bisexual needs assessment of Greater Los Angeles in 2015, and hosted the launch of the needs assessment in the community room at Plummer Park in West Hollywood.

“…supports the idea of asking the City Council to consider a Bisexual Task Force, but that she had joined a Lesbian and Gay board.”

“…talk to their own Councilmembers to see if there is a need for this in the community, and if so, to possibly come back with it in the future.

”…said the Board spends a large majority of its time on gay issues, and that people of all orientations might be better served by having one large board.“

”…said members were appointed to represent their particular identity as gay or lesbian, and that he didn’t want to presume to speak on someone else’s identity.“

“said that we are moving toward having one voice as a community, and would like to help people form an LGBT task force, seeing the changing nature of the community…”

- Learn more about why BiNet USA,Los Angeles Bi Task ForceandAmBi - Your Bi Social Community members are visiting ‪#‎weho‬ this Thursday: http://binetusa.blogspot.com/2016/06/bi-weho-city-council-event-june-9th-2016.html

A female-id’ing person kissing another female-id’ing person doesn’t ALWAYS mean one (or even b

A female-id’ing person kissing another female-id’ing person doesn’t ALWAYS mean one (or even both) of them self-identifies as Lesbian … Bisexual+ People exist! 

Lesbian Women ❤️ Bi+ Women
Bi+ Women Lesbian Women
Bi+ Women other Bi+ Women … it’s all good!

Bisexuality is the attraction to more than one Gender, or to Genders similar to- and different from- one’s own.

It includes people of ALL Genders & Gender Presentations including but not limited to: Cis Intersex, Genderfluid, Genderqueer, Nonbinary, Trans and so many more.

Bisexual+, Biromantic+ (Bi+ or BiPlus for short) is the commonly used “shorthand” for the entire Non-Monosexual or otherwise MSpec (Multiple Gender Attraction Spectrum) Community including but not limited to: Bisexual/Biromantic, Ambisexual, Flexisexual, Fluid, Heteroflexible/Homoflexible, Multisexual, No Labels, Omnisexual, Pansexual, Plurisexual, PoMoSexual, Polysexual, Same-gender Loving (SGL), Sapiosexual, Queer-identified, and so many more.

SoPlease remember to ALWAYS include the “B” in LGBTQ+


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miles-thebi:

If you define bisexuality as “an attraction to men and women”, then define pansexuality a “an attraction to men, women, and transgender individuals”, you are using transphobia to support a biphobic idea of bisexuality.

Simple as that.

The transphobia should be obvious; making the distinction between men, women, and transgender individuals invalidates trans men and trans women as ACTUAL men and women. It also places all transgender individuals in this “other” category. Not man, not women, no matter how they identify their gender. Trans women are actual women, not an “other” kind of woman. Trans men are actual men, not an “other” kind of men. Nonbinary people can identify under the terms “men” and “women” if they choose to, and they will still be just as valid as men and women as another individual.

The biphobia may be a little less obvious, however. Bisexuality is not defined as an attraction to cis men and cis women (saying so actually invalidates many bisexual people and aids in the invalidation of actual trans/nonbinary bisexuals), it is defined by the majority of the community as a “attraction to two or more genders or same and different genders”. The act of claiming otherwise (on a community level, not a personal definition level) is erasive and contributes to biphobia within the LGTBQ++ community.

Your argument that “bisexuals are attracted to cis men and cis women” not only invalidates trans men and trans women, and nobinary/trans bisexuals, it results in two very dangerous dynamics in the LGTBQ++ community.

Firstly, it creates tension between the bisexual and transgender/nonbinary communities. Historically, this is a fairly recent tension, as trans activists and bisexual activists often worked hand in hand during the first trans rights movement. This dynamic shreds apart two of some of the closet knit communities, and forces transgender people to identify as labels other than bisexual, else they face a wave of biphobia from their fellow transgender community. Despite this (thankfully), a large amount of transgender individuals identify as bisexual, and have begun doing what they can to end the faulty idea that bisexual is binary.

The second dynamic is constant fighting between the bisexual and pansexual community. Opinions about umbrella term usage aside, these communities have an enormous amount of overlap that requires them to work together to fight ideas of monosexism; a social system that operates on the belief that single gender attraction is the standard, and enforces this by rewarding SGA and punishing MGA. Gay/Lesbian monosexism operates in a different environment than hetero monosexism, but both cause strife towards the MGA communities.

These dynamics are reinforced daily by all members of the LGBTQ++ that continue to allow the bisexual definition of “attraction to cis men and cis women” to spread and be taken as the real definition. Until the rest of the LGBTQ++ gets on board and begins to allow bisexuals to define their community, and their individual forms of attraction, we will not be able to heal the fracturing relationships between BT and P.

autismserenity: [image description: an extreme close-up of light blue forget-me-not flowers against

autismserenity:

[image description: an extreme close-up of light blue forget-me-not flowers against a blurry blue background. white art deco letters in all caps say “monosexuality is a heterosexist idea used to oppress gay people and erase bisexuality from history and society”] 

i just 

i just got inspired by the 1990 Bisexual Manifesto  

like what if they were right? what if the concept of monosexism rests on the insistence that there ARE two and only two genders, two and only two sexes, two and only two gender roles, to pair up in the first place? that makes sense, doesn’t it? 

what if that means that it doesn’t just loathe bisexuals, because our very existence breaks that binary, but also intersex people, aces/aros, and trans people of all types? 

what if that means that it does tolerate both straight and gay people, on the surface, but it’s demanding a rigid adherence to gender norms that the majority of gay people don’t fit into in the first place?

remember how Senator Barney Frank, and the HRC, fought for years to keep “gender identity and expression” out of the united states’s Employment Non-Discrimination Act? and even the Advocate magazine said, if it had passed that way, “many LGB individuals would have still been vulnerable to job loss as it would remain perfectly legal to fire a masculine-presenting woman or a feminine-presenting man. Those viewed as somehow outside of what society expects from us in terms of gender would remain a target.”

what if that’s heterosexism versus monosexism?

One part of our community sees things as being centered around “gay versus straight”, and thinks that we are only oppressed if people think we’re gay. Some of those folks acknowledge that cissexism exists alongside it, so people are oppressed for being gay or trans. In this worldview, people who “look straight” - intersex people, aces/aros, “het-partnered” bisexuals, nonbinary people, straight and passing trans people - are privileged. Gay men, lesbians, and anybody who will be read as gay or non-passing, are oppressed.

The other part of our community sees things as being centered around “violating the gender binary”, and thinks that we are oppressed when we are seen as bending or breaking that binary. This includes gay men, lesbians, and/or non-passing trans people, but it also includes everyone who is nonbinary, passing trans people, intersex, ace, aro, bi, et cetera.

Because the rule of the gender binary is that there have to be two and only two genders, which have to correspond correctly with the two and only two sexes that are acknowledged, and the two and only two gender roles, and they have to be with each other, and only each other. That is how the gender binary works. That’s what it is.

I think that one perspective is what we label as “heterosexism,” and the other is what we label as “monosexism”. I think this is the big divide that has always, always been present in the community. And I think that lately we’re being told over and over, by the first group, that believing monosexism exists is anti-gay, and it’s keeping everyone from seeing that actually, monosexism itself is anti-gay.


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bisexual-community:

miles-thebi:

Tips to Be Queer Enough to Deserve to go to Pride

Often, there is a pressure in LGBTQIAP+ spaces to fit into a “queer” mold. While many G&L individuals don’t experiences this pressure, those with the ability to be attracted to a gender other than their own do. This pressure leads a lot of bisexual, pansexual,  and asexual people feeling like they don’t belong in Pride events, especially with their different-gender partner by their side. When we…

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Q: How to be “Queer Enough” to “Deserve” to go to Pride?
A: Be Queer!


and always remember that all sorts of LGBT people were actively were involved in the Stonewall Riots, then all working together immediately started organizing new, more radical, activist, LGBT+ Liberation Groups (x)(x)(x)(x) and that it was in fact a young, radical, progressive, feminist, Bisexual+ Woman who first conceived of and then chaired the committee that organized the 1st Pride Marches and Festivals that we we now continue to celebrate worldwide every June

bisexualbertmccracken:

yknow, obviously there’s nothing wrong with someone who doesn’t wanna put a label to their sexuality, cause yknow people like different things and theres nothing bad abt someone not liking labels

but, the fact that almost every single character thats into multiple genders says that they just “dont like labels” or something along those lines is blatant biphobia

like, if it was one or two characters, then i wouldnt bat an eye, but considering its a trend for people to make their bi-coded character just “not like labels” is super fucking transparent

bisexual is not a bad thing, bisexual is not a dirty word, and it fucking sucks that 9/10 bisexual characters never actually call themselves bisexual

like, the only times i can think of characters who outright call themselves bisexual, is Darryl from Crazy Ex Girlfriend and like… there probably is more characters… but its pretty obvious that popular media thinks that bisexuality is a bad word, a taboo thing that must never, ever be stated

and i dunno about yall, but im fucking sick of my sexuality never being portrayed in a good light, im sick of seeing so few characters actually calling themselves bisexual, im sick of having so many bi woman characters just being hypersexualized and used to please men (i.e. having a bi girl whos bisexuality is only there for the male gaze), and im just sick of how people constantly portray ny sexuality

Bisexuality isnt bad and being bisexual is awesome, even if the media constantly tries to erase us or show us as awful

ffspunk:

stop making bisexuals feel invalid in the lgbtq+ community, what we went through to figure ourselves out was just as hard as what you went through.

bisexual-community:Think Bisexual+ People Have Straight Passing Privilege? Here’s Why You’re Mistabisexual-community:Think Bisexual+ People Have Straight Passing Privilege? Here’s Why You’re Mista

bisexual-community:

Think Bisexual+ People Have Straight Passing Privilege? Here’s Why You’re Mistaken

Bisexual+ people may not be perceived as queer if they’re datingsomeoneperceived asthe“opposite” of their gender – so does that mean they have straight passing privilege?

You might think so, but try considering the perspective in this comic for a more nuanced answer to this question. It’s a breakdown of the assumptions behind the idea of bisexual+ “straight passing privilege” – and the harm you cause by erasing people’s identities when you make these assumptions.

It’s possible to acknowledge that different queer folks have different experiences without erasing anyone.


  • Bisexual+, Biromantic+ (Bi+ for short) is the commonly used “shorthand” for the entire Non-Monosexual Community including but not limited to: Bisexual/Biromantic, Ambisexual, Flexisexual, Fluid, Heteroflexible/Homoflexible, Multisexual, No Labels, Omnisexual, Pansexual, PoMosexual, Polysexual, Sapiosexual, Queer, and so many more.
  • Bisexuality is the attraction to more than one gender, or to genders similar to- and different from- one’s own.
  • Bisexual Erasure, Bisexual Invisibility is the tendency to ignore, remove, falsify, or re-explain evidence of bisexuality in history, academia, news media and other primary sources. In its most extreme form, bisexual erasure can include denying that bisexuality exists. It is often a manifestation of conscious and/or unconscious biphobia and/or monosexism.
  • Straight Passing, Hetero Passing, etc. is all those things you get just by being, acting, or appearing straight. Conversely, straight privilege is all those things you lose when you are, act, or appear as queer. Becasue hetrosexuality is (inncorectly) seen as the “default” state, it means that all people are initially assumed to be “straight” unless they do something to actively signal they are queer, ie dress, mannerisms, coming out, wearing pins, badges, t-shirts, jewelry, etc.
  • Trans Erasure,Non-Binary Erasure, etc, is the tendency to ignore, deny, or minimize the existence of trans, androgynous, gender non-conforming, genderqueer, NB, etc. people.  It is often a manifestation of conscious and/or unconscious cisexism and/or transphobia.

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bisexual-community:Dear #LGBTQ leaders @ #WomensMarch, Please remember to include #Bisexual+ when

bisexual-community:

Dear #LGBTQ leaders @ #WomensMarch,

Please remember to include #Bisexual+ when you talk about #Queer community. It matters.

Thank you.
Sara Ramirez


Note: There has been much debate within the main organizing committee Women’s March deciding on wording, who was explicitly included, etc. At first it was Lesbians, then Lesbian and Queer, then went to LGTQ+(without the B), and so on and so forth.  When politely asked to also remember and include Bi+ Women (x) (x) (x) etc, for whatever reason the organizers then chose to move to Queer only, rather than to also just #SayBisexual.

[Update: after much outcry currently it’s now been changed to LGBTQIA, the wording on this & some other issues(ieTrans inclusion vs TERF, Sex-workers rights via anti’s, Bisexual+ people vs monosexual, etc.) has been contentious and changing quickly, so it’s been difficult to keep up … so if it is changed again no disrespect or attempts to be deceptive or inaccurate meant]

Sadly a great deal of the problem is that (as usual) no one reached back, when representitives of the bisexual+ community reached out to Women’s March to try to participate.  It’s a constant problem. Even well meaning would be/should be“allies” (1) assume that Some Gay Group will “take care of you people” or (2) it never occurs to (some #NotAll) people that bi+ people are active and organized, except for maybe swingers clubs or hook-up apps. 

While it sounds like a joke, it’s a real long-running issue and causes no end of trouble.  And so far no one has come up with a way to correct it. 


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thefayth:As I say daily, “Bi is not binary” (thinking of making t-shirts and a banner at this poin

thefayth:

As I say daily, “Bi is not binary” (thinking of making t-shirts and a banner at this point).

So grateful for the consistent advocacy of so many fellow non monosexual community members working hella hard to disprove a fallacy that murders bi, pan, fluid, queer (bi+) people by isolating them from each other and the full embrace of a 50 year old bisexual movement started by self described punks, freaks, and waaaaaay outside the binary box thinkers. How dare anyone try to redefine our identity against us.

I’ve decided to protest that wherever I go, wherever I be…sorry/not sorry, if that bothers you…

**Photo Caption**
BiNet USA President Faith Cheltenham, a Black bi, pan, fluid and queer activist stands facing camera with blue hair, unflinching in the face of biphobia (trust her, it IS out there).

**Photo Credit**
Deborah Atwater

**Further reading**
https://radicalbi.wordpress.com/2011/02/22/words-binary-and-biphobia-or-why-bi-is-binary-but-ftm-is-not/ (by bi theorist Shiri Eisner who began the “say bisexuality is binary one more time” meme in 2013.

http://juliaserano.blogspot.com/2012/11/bisexuality-and-binaries-revisited.html (Trans-bi author and critical genius Julia Serano expands on 2010 classic ode “Bisexuality does not reinforce the gender binary”)

http://www.writewhereithurts.net/whats-in-a-name-on-bi-and-pan-sexualities/ (Excellent recent analysis exploring how binary based biphobia attacks undermine bi, pan, fluid, queer (bi+) communities)

https://thetaskforceblog.org/2014/09/30/biphobia-not-in-my-name/
(One of my favorite writers, and my friend Aud Traher’s classic take on binary bisexual accusations and how they hurt bi-trans-non binary people like them)

http://binetusa.blogspot.com/2014/01/1990-bi-manifesto.html
(Historical evidence from national bi magazine manifesto that rejects the idea of binary genders over 25 years ago, but yeah way to catch up with us on the topic.)


Post link

caringbibear:

bisexual-community:

bialogue-group:

passingprivilege:

bi people: *more likely to be victims of rape than gay or straight people* 

bi people: *more likely to live in poverty than gay or straight people*

also bi people: *more likely to be victims of intimate partner violence than gay or straight people*

also bi people: *more likely to face discrimination in the health care system than gay or straight people*

still bi people: *get paid less, on average, than gay or straight people*

and still, bi people: *more likely to suffer mental illness than gay or straight people*

some fucker on the internet: no but really bi people aren’t oppressed because they’re bi it’s because people think you’re gay. biphobia is a lie. only homophobia is real. hate me please bi people but you cannot deny my ultimate logic™

Shockingly there are it seems a number of people who continue to be so discomforted by even the idea of Bisexuality that instead of researching the above by now very well know/well verified statistics, they commenced to whine, carp, complain, deny and fuss instead.

So for all those whose “google finger” seems to have broken, let us assist you: 

Here is an Easy to Understand Set of MemeswithLinkstoAll Pertinent Studies created by Shiri Eisner, a well known bisexual academic and author

Yipes! At this time tremendous amounts of sold and reliable research showsthatBisexual+ People have the WORST Health + Quality of Life outcomes of ALL demographic groups: Gay, Straight or Lesbian!  But when confronted by this instead of say … clicking the link to find out why, assorted biphobes and other species of malcontents reacted by winging on that bisexuals must be lying and making this up! *head desk*

Yikes Me thought this lunacy restricted to repubs oiy

ffspunk:

stop making bisexuals feel invalid in the lgbtq+ community, what we went through to figure ourselves out was just as hard as what you went through.

mediumkravitz:

Depressing to (constantly) remember that bisexuality is always blamed for “perpetuating dualisms” or whatever when it’s primarily straight and gay people acting like our sexuality is two halves of two whole identities, both of which we “fail” to truly embody.  

whatsnew-lgbtq:

whatsnew-lgbtq:

I really hate on this website that we erased the term monosexism as it was a very useful term m-spec people have being using for years but terfs decided it was bad becuse it group them with straight people and all of you believed it.

Monosexism is the belief that people who are only attracted to one gender is somehow better or more superior to those who are not monosexual.

Monosexism seeing everything as only gay or straight and if your not you either lying or making things up.

Monosexism is erasing multisexual people are seeing them as less memebers in tge community.

Monosexism is seeing multisexual people are dangerous and dirty

Monosexism is seeing m-spec men as gay men who havent fully accepted themselves as gay.

Monosexism is seeing m-spec women as either lesbians or straight women depending on who your talking to

Monosexism is not seeing multisexual as a full identity and only half of something or on the way of realizing our ‘true’ sexuality.

But you guys all decided it was bad becuase terfs said it ‘group gays with the straights and that it was inherently evil for that.’ And you believed it.

Fact: The rate of relationship violence against bisexual people, particularly bisexual women, is much higher than for people of other orientations. Your sexuality does not make you less trustworthy or less desirable as a partner, and it should never be used against you or seen as a “problem” in your relationship.

Source [x]

Fact: You don’t have to choose a side. Orientation is not a binary between gay and straight, and even if you end up in a monogamous, long-term relationship, you continue to exist outside of that binary because who you are is not the same thing as who you are with.

Fact: Sexuality is not a binary. You don’t have to be gay or straight: there are so many other identities out there!

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