May 17th is International Day Against Homophobia, Biphobia, Interphobia, and Transphobia!
(Image description: an intersex inclusive progress pride flag with a transparent white square in the center, text inside the square reads “International Day Against Homophobia, Biphobia, Interphobia, and Transphobia”; above this is the date “May 17th, 2022” and below are the words “Take a stand against hatred and queerphobia.”)
not gonna lie, seeing exclusionists throwing a pity party because they have to be reminded that people outside of their approved 3-4 letters exist will never not be funny to me
[Image Description: Screenshots of a series of tweets by a user named @valeriehalla that read
ok: i’m scared to exist online right now, even in what we should be able to consider safe spaces for queer folks
i’m scared because we are all watching continually as more and more of us are violently picked off and destroyed
by other queer folks, and by people who claim to be sympathetic to us, utilizing the same rhetoric that should be helping and empowering us
the word “discourse”, at this point, is only ever used sarcastically and with a kind of quiet dread by my friends
we joke about being problematic, but me, my peers and maybe you too, live in a state of constant low anxiety
over the fact that we don’t get second chances to make mistakes. if you’re a queer person of any kind of visibility, it’s one and done
the well of patience and compassion runs deep for our cis/straight allies, and we reserve NOTHING for ourselves
this is assuming you even make a mistake. we target each other for complete bullshit just as often
weeks ago i was chased off twitter for using the word “queer”, before that i was getting death threats over fabricated purity politics
friends of mine have been targeted with callout posts over things they didn’t do or for weird fandom drama with zero material impact
i’m not trying to absolve any of us of guilt. we’ve all done and will do wrong things, we’ll hurt each other, again and again
it’s easy, because we’re all a little bit fucked up over here. we’re carrying wounds we’re weird, we’re not always presentable
but that’s exactly why we need patience and compassion for each other more than anything else
because those wounds make it so easy for us to destroy eachother, and some of y'all may be tempted
it’s easier. when it’s some 20-something queer artist struggling to meet half the poverty line, it’s easy to run them off for hurting you
i GET why it’s tempting for some folks, because this is power that you can exert, a situation you can change
when we’re all so tired and so used to being powerless
but please understand that the folks you’re targeting may not come back from it. they may not ever come back. it’s happened, it will happen
when you mark someone as unsaveable and irredeemable in the only space they have to exist in, they can’t exist anymore
End of tweets.]
Just to make something about this crystal clear, and this is something that I think many people will recognize about these tweets, the situations that valeriehalla is describing aren’t just the result of people punishing honest mistakes. Some of these things are straight up authoritarian bullshit perpetrated by people who are trying to create power structures in the LGBTQ+ community.
This is what it means to be a TERF, a transmedicalist/truscum, or an ace exclusionist. This is the environment they’re trying to build, one where other people in the LGBTQ+ community have to live with fear and anxiety of the kind of authoritarian bullying that these people try to create.
It’s really important to push back on this stuff anytime we see it, because authoritarians actively work to spread their malfeasant ideology. They lie and manipulate in order to spread their message because they honestly believe that anything, no matter how immoral, is justified in pursuit of their core goals. And their core goals always involve hurting us, all of us. They only see three types of people; those that agree with them and are allies, those that don’t agree with them and are enemies, and those people who they hate and will only ever attack.
We fight them by not letting them get away with it. We fight them by educating people about their tactics and their evil. We fight them by protecting those of us who are young enough or immature enough to still be vulnerable to their recruitment tactics. And we win by never giving them an inch, ever.
In a fight where one side believes only in the oppression and eventual destruction of the other, there’s no middle ground to be found, they are wholly wrong in their beliefs and they’re willing to hurt people in service to them.
[ID:a twitter thread by user rylan @/testosteronejew on May 20-21, 2022
my favorite part of tonight was when dave chappelle ambushed us at the john mulaney show, told a bunch of transphobic jokes, a massive stadium of people laughed, and then john mulaney hugged him at the end
anyway i was such a big john mulaney fan and i think i still am, but they also had our phones in little locked wallets so we couldn’t film, so i just had to sit there joke after joke about trans people and hear 18k people laughing along
this was at the columbus show and he only came because he lives like an hour away. being trans is so exhausting i can’t even have a nice night out without being reminded that most of society wants trans people dead
it’s been an hour since i tweeted this and i already feel the need to clarify that saying i think i’m still a fan was me still processing it which i’m allowed to do, i don’t know how to feel. i’m just hurt and it literally just happened so… yeah. it’s complex and shitty and sad]
I went digging through that twitter thread and found this post from last month, in which Chappelle opened for Mulaney in Denver. TW for transphobia, homophobia, ableism, sexism, and anti-Chinese racism. Anyway here’s the post. Obviously there’s no recording but I googled about and saw similar comments about his set elsewhere.
Casual reminder that lack of sexual desire/lack of desire to have sex, is still considered a sign of mental illness by a lot of reputable medical organizations. Just in case you forgot aphobia is a thing.
You know it DOES strike a nerve with me that for many queer youth (particularly the terminally online), one standard insult is “kill yourself.”
It strikes a nerve because of how I know that, within our community, rates of depression and mental illness with suicidal ideation are abnormally high. And because on multiple occasions when I pointed out the elevated rates of trans suicide to cis people in hopes to garner sympathy for our cause- people literally responded to my face, “So I see the problem works itself out. Good.”
That is an exact quote. And it has stuck with me for years.
Bigots are literally calling for our deaths. They encourage trans youth to kill themselves. They prefer it if we die.
And then young people within the community turn around and weaponize that same language to stab at each other and pretend that it doesn’t have ill effects on us as a collective. As if telling another queer person to kill themselves over a bad opinion, poor conduct, or something as trivial as fiction or an interpersonal disagreement does not in fact enforce and legitimize the threat of violence against us.
No- I don’t think you should tell anyone to kill themselves. I don’t take joy in this cruelty. I have been cruel before, and I’ve long since had my fill of it.
Yall : I dont have any problem if people reclaim queer for themselves and use queer only to refer themselves i just have a problem when they use queer as an umbrella term or towards other lgbtqa people uwu
last thing on this Depp situation, I promise: the LGBTQ+ people defending him so hard are embarrassing because he has repeatedly shown his dislike of us with his biphobia towards amber and his misgendering of her trans friend including on the stand.
whether you think he’s innocent in this or not, he’s still a vile bigoted man. and while no one deserves false abuse accusations, making him out to be some pure innocent baby who has never done anything wrong is extremely questionable.
In addition to being biphobic/transphobic he’s also racist.
Johnny Depp started dating Winona Ryder when she was 17 and he was fucking 25 and he is literally known for dating women 20+ years younger than him, which is predatory as fuck.
I was watching Shrek 2 and my wife and I were reflecting on how much transmisogyny was in it as jokes (e.g. “gender confused wolf” “ugly step sister” “women’s underwear” etc.) and it’s so extremely ridiculous to me the transphobes’ line that having positive representations of trans people (esp trans women) in children’s media would be “too confusing” for kids—because they are literally already making references to trans women in children’s media, they’re just doing it in the most offensive ways possible. Taking away all the empty cis rationalization of it, really they’re not arguing for kids to not see trans characters, they’re arguing that kids should see trans characters as demonized, fetishized, objects of ridicule and disgust. Like that’s literally the subtext in these “how do I explain this to my kids” conversations. They really mean “let me continue to explain this in ways that groom kids into hating trans people and themselves if they are trans”
This…is a great point
I mean, there were absolutely people arguing for the other side, too. The “Shrek 2 is part of the trans agenda because it shows trans people existing, even if it is as the butt of the joke” crowd was absolutely a thing. It’s been some years since I’ve seen it, but I’ve no doubt that some horrible little remnant still exists somewhere, and also no doubt that it’s primed to rear its ugly head again at its first opportunity.
the only reason cops are at pride now is to intimidate gay people into not making it a riot again and i will stand by that fact until the day i die
If the occasion should arise and I attend a pride festival, I would also like it to not become a riot.
imagine being this guy
arent they there? to stop any attacks from the anti lgbt groups?? yknow the ones that ALWAYS gather there???
contrary to what this newer generation of lgbt people think, cops are a new addition to prides. only within the past 10/20 years have they actually started “protecting” pride. aka standing around and intimidating the general public. historically, lgbt people have protected ourselves and eachother during pride events. from police in a lot of cases actually. ive been to pride events where the anti lgbt protesters were the ones being “protected” from the pride crowd… the cops arent there for us. theyre there to boost the image of the police force and make us think they care. the only people who feel safe around cops are the classes that they are meant to protect and people who are uneducated about police. (theres a heavy overlap as well.) you may feel safe around cops but many people do not. theyre literally dogs to the upper class.
2018 Baltimore pride was crashed by terfs who marched with the cops. pigs protected them.
In hamilton ontario the cops let neo nazis attack people and said they didnt help because people didnt want them there
I was at NYC Pride a couple of years ago and a massive section of the main route was completely dedicated to cops. The sight of a prison bus driving by with rainbow flags on it made me sick. That was the year that Toronto Pride asked the police not to bring guns to pride. And so the NYPD invited them to our parade, marching through and proudly brandishing their guns. Back at the Stonewall Inn, people who were protesting the commercialization of Pride were beaten by police. I used to buy some of what the commenters above are saying about protection, but after seeing all of that Pride needs to be anti cop.
[Image description: The image right before the above link is of the linked article. It’s a Vice News article titled, “Cops Were Banned from NYC Pride. They Showed Up With Riot Gear.” The subtitle says, “Eight people were arrested on Sunday after skirmishes between the New York Police Department and people celebrating Pride in New York City.” The article has a photo of cops harassing civilians. One cop is pulling the arm of a pride attendee while other attendees try to stop him. Another cop has cuffed someone on the ground. End ID.]
what do y'all pro-cops-at-Pride people think the zeroth Pride, the Stonewall Riots, were about?
spoilers: it was police brutality against the queer community
and in any case, do y'all know who does the ACTUAL protecting against hate groups at these events? at my first pride over a decade ago, it was butches. it was trans people and bears and quite a few leather folks. it was volunteers who stood on that line and made themselves barriers between us and those that came to protest and hate us, because nobody else was going to do it, and that year the protesters outnumbered the attendees.
and as of the last pride i attended a few years ago in the same city, do you know who stood in the dead center, away entirely from protesters and violent people, openly brandishing RIFLES? it was the fucking cops.
your local butch will keep you twice as safe as a cop will, if the cops aren’t the very ones making it unsafe in the first place.
I am BEYOND tired of people using asexuality to justify being queerphobic and kinkphobic and sanitising pride. PLENTY of asexuals have zero issue with sexual stuff at pride, whether they enjoy such things are not, cus they arent cunts. And plenty of people who are not asexual are saying the same “but the gross kinky queers make me uncomfortable” that u fuckers are. Ur asexuality is not a free pass to be a queerphobic and kinkphobic twat. It is irrelevant. Shut your damn mouths.
They are also completely erasing kinky aces like myself. It’s an absolute shit take all around
Oh absolutely. Like my asexual and kinky identity is inherently intwined. I cannot have one without the other. But fuck me I guess
According to many this week, it seems that I, as an American Jew, apparently have a personal role in controlling American, European, and Middle Eastern geopolitics. Yet, I still cannot convince cisgender-heterosexual men to use my pronouns (they/them) correctly. What gives?
Honestly, if you keep intentionally tagging “queer” as “q slur” instead of “q word” ESPECIALLY if it’s a reblog from someone and you don’t know if they’re okay with you doing that and ESPECIALLY if a queer person has asked you not to…
I’m just going to assume you’re a queerphobe ♀️
Most of the people who are offended by that word are gay men and trans men. And in Southern USA the word is most commonly used by conservative Republicans as an insult specifically towards those groups.
Whether you identify as it or not, the word has an oppressive/negative history in other countries. In my country words like “queer” and “homo” are very offensive slurs that no LGBT person would be happy to hear you use in any context.
If someone has a problem with the word queer, DO NOT accuse them of automatically being a bigot. Not everywhere is Northeastern USA.
It’s a slur, OP. Keep being mad about it.
Did anyone say it wasn’t on this thread? No. Just asking people to respect queer people. Not that hard.
“Did anyone say that word wasn’t a slur? No! Here let me use it again since it obviously upsets you. OH OH OH BUT RESPECT THE PEOPLE WHO I’M DISRESPECTING RIGHT NOW, PLEASE! UWU”
jesus you’re all assholes. Stop referring to us by that word. It’s terrible and the only people who are comfortable with it are the ones trying to turn LGBT into some kind of political fashion statement. Knock this fucking shit off.
No one is fucking referring you as that word on this thread. This is about people who have reclaimed it. Jesus fuck stop being an asshole.
Mod Bethany
Op: Hey can you tag “queer” in a more respectful way? Like q-word instead of q-slur? That way everyone is comfortable
Queerphobes: EXCUSE ME WHAT ABOUT ME THE WORD QUEER ONCE KILLED MY DOG NO ONE IS EVER ALLOWED TO USE THE WORD UNLESS THEY CATER TO ME SPECIFICALLY YOU CANT USE A SLURRRRRR AS AN IDENTITY (even though I identify as a dyke or use the word fag etc) BECAUSE I SAID SO
“queerbaiting in real life” you mean exploring self expression regardless of the outcome bc it’s good for you and not owing it to people to come out???
queerbaiting is a marketing technique real people aren’t products or your fictional blorbos even the mega celebrities are owed privacy jesus christ
So what I’ve learned from the past couple months of being really loud about being a bi woman on Tumblr is: A lot of young/new LGBT+ people on this site do not understand that some of the stuff they’re saying comes across to other LGBT+ people as offensive, aggressive, or threatening. And when they actually find out the history and context, a lot of them go, “Oh my god, I’m so sorry, I never meant to say that.”
Like, “queer is a slur”: I get the impression that people saying this are like… oh, how I might react if I heard someone refer to all gay men as “f*gs”. Like, “Oh wow, that’s a super loaded word with a bunch of negative freight behind it, are you really sure you want to put that word on people who are still very raw and would be alarmed, upset, or offended if they heard you call them it, no matter what you intended?”
So they’re really surprised when self-described queers respond with a LOT of hostility to what feels like a well-intentioned reminder that some people might not like it.
That’s because there’s a history of “political lesbians”, like Sheila Jeffreys, who believe that no matter their sexual orientation, women should cut off all social contact with men, who are fundamentally evil, and only date the “correct” sex, which is other women. Political lesbians claim that relationships between women, especially ones that don’t contain lust, are fundamentally pure, good, and unproblematic. They therefore regard most of the LGBT community with deep suspicion, because its members are either way too into sex, into the wrong kind of sex, into sex with men, are men themselves, or somehow challenge the very definitions of sex and gender.
When “queer theory” arrived in the 1980s and 1990s as an organized attempt by many diverse LGBT+ people in academia to sit down and talk about the social oppressions they face, political lesbians like Jeffreys attacked it harshly, publishing articles like “The Queer Disappearance of Lesbians”, arguing that because queer theory said it was okay to be a man or stop being a man or want to have sex with a man, it was fundamentally evil and destructive. And this attitude has echoed through the years; many LGBT+ people have experience being harshly criticized by radical feminists because being anything but a cis “gold star lesbian” (another phrase that gives me war flashbacks) was considered patriarchal, oppressive, and basically evil.
And when those arguments happened, “queer” was a good umbrella to shelter under, even when people didn’t know the intricacies of academic queer theory; people who identified as “queer” were more likely to be accepting and understanding, and “queer” was often the only label or community bisexual and nonbinary people didn’t get chased out of. If someone didn’t disagree that people got to call themselves queer, but didn’t want to be called queer themselves, they could just say “I don’t like being called queer” and that was that. Being “queer” was to being LGBT as being a “feminist” was to being a woman; it was opt-in.
But this history isn’t evident when these interactions happen. We don’t sit down and say, “Okay, so forty years ago there was this woman named Sheila, and…” Instead we queers go POP! like pufferfish, instantly on the defensive, a red haze descending over our vision, and bellow, “DO NOT TELL ME WHAT WORDS I CANNOT USE,” because we cannot find a way to say, “This word is so vital and precious to me, I wouldn’t be alive in the same way if I lost it.” And then the people who just pointed out that this word has a history, JEEZ, way to overreact, go away very confused and off-put, because they were just trying to say.
But I’ve found that once this is explained, a lot of people go, “Oh wow, okay, I did NOT mean to insinuate that, I didn’t realize that I wasalso saying something with a lot of painful freight to it.”
And that? That gives me hope for the future.
Similarily: “Dyke/butch/femme are lesbian words, bisexual/pansexual women shouldn’t use them.”
When I speak to them, lesbians who say this seem to be under the impression that bisexuals must have our own history and culture and words that are all perfectly nice, so why can’t we just use those without poaching someone else’s?
And often, they’re really shocked when I tell them: We don’t. We can’t. I’d love to; it’s not possible.
“Lesbian” used to be a word that simply meant a woman who loved other women. And until feminism, very, very few women had the economic freedom to choose to live entirely away from men. Lesbian bars that began in the 1930s didn’t interrogate you about your history at the door; many of the women who went there seeking romantic or sexual relationships with other women were married to men at the time. When The Daughters of Bilitis formed in 1955 to work for the civil and political wellbeing of lesbians, the majority of its members were closeted, married women, and for those women, leaving their husbands and committing to lesbian partners was a risky and arduous process the organization helped them with. Women were admitted whether or not they’d at one point truly loved or desired their husbands or other men–the important thing was that they loved women and wanted to explore that desire.
Lesbian groups turned against bisexual and pansexual women as a class in the 1970s and 80s, when radical feminists began to teach that to escape the Patriarchy’s evil influence, women needed to cut themselves off from men entirely. Having relationships with men was “sleeping with the enemy” and colluding with oppression. Many lesbian radical feminists viewed, and still view, bisexuality as a fundamentally disordered condition that makes bisexuals unstable, abusive, anti-feminist, and untrustworthy.
That process of expelling bi women from lesbian groups with immense prejudice continues to this day and leaves scars on a lot of bi/pan people. A lot of bisexuals, myself included, have an experience of “double discrimination”; we are made to feel unwelcome or invisible both in straight society, and in LGBT spaces. And part of this is because attempts to build a bisexual/pansexual community identity have met with strong resistance from gays and lesbians, so we have far fewer books, resources, histories, icons, organizations, events, and resources than gays and lesbians do, despite numerically outnumbering them..
So every time I hear that phrase, it’s another painful reminder for me of all the experiences I’ve had being rejected by the lesbian community. But bisexual experiences don’t get talked about or signalboosted much,so a lot of young/new lesbians literally haven’t learned this aspect of LGBT+ history.
And once I’ve explained it, I’ve had a heartening number of lesbians go, “That’s not what I wanted to happen, so I’m going to stop saying that.”
a lot of shit i hear in the discourse reminds me of actual things homophobes say irl and it’s… really troubling?
“preteens identifying as ace is sexualizing!” whenever i headcanon a character as gay or bi/pan, my mom tells me, not everything has to be sexual. lgbt identities are viewed as inherently sexual and inappropriate for children.
“why do you feel the need to talk about being ace? it’s tmi, no one needs or wants to know about your sex life except your partner.” i’m not against your lifestyle, just keep it in the bedroom, okay?
“telling kids they can experience sexual attraction is grooming.” please stop conflating minority orientations to pedophilia, this has been used against gay people forever.
“asexuality is a disease and doesn’t naturally occur.” do i even have to explain this one?
what i’m trying to say is that it’s really hurtful for me, an ace lesbian, to hear this rhetoric used against me by straight people because i’m gay, then go into lgbt spaces–which are supposed to be safe for me–and hear other gay people saying almost word-for-word the exact same things, this time directed against my asexuality.
please stop using these arguments. don’t repackage homophobic rhetoric and use it against a different minority orientation.
(Image description: six square images with purple backgrounds and white borders, every image has bold white text in the center. All together this text reads: “I don’t care if testosterone therapy makes me sterile. I am allowed to live a life that does not revolve around childbearing or parenthood. I do not have to prioritize childbearing or parenthood in my life. My bodily autonomy and freedom of choice are worth more than potential fertility. I don’t give a fuck what you believe my "biological purpose” is. This body is mine to do with as I will.“)
Possibly controversial, but I don’t care if testosterone therapy makes me sterile.
I’m allowed to live a life that does not revolve around possible future childbearing or parenthood. My own bodily autonomy and freedom of choice are worth more than potential fertility.
I don’t care what anyone believes my "biological purpose” is. My body is not your “earthen vessel”. I am not here to “be fruitful and multiply”. I don’t want to join your womban only arts and crafts circle and finger-paint with period blood. I don’t have to find any kind of special meaning or spiritual significance in the reproductive organs that I was born with.
The only reason I am here right now with this body that is mine is to do whatever I want with it.
I’m allowed to not want pregnancy and childbirth, or the possibility of them. I’m allowed to not want parenthood in any form. I don’t have to prioritize those things in my life.
The potential loss of my fertility on testosterone is not a loss for me, it is a benefit. For more than half of my life now I’ve known that I never want to experience pregnancy or childbirth, and yet I am clearly expected to value my potential ability to do those things above my own actual wants and needs? No chance.
No trans person should be required to delay medically transitioning because of concerns about future fertility, if the trans person themselves isn’t concerned with the ability to have biological children.
I resent the notion that medically transitioning is harmful because we’re–allegedly–choosing to sterilize ourselves*. Choosing sterilization is not harmful. The ability to choose sterilization should be the right of every person, regardless of gender, who is of an age capable of reproducing.
(*Contrary to popular belief, testosterone therapy is not a contraceptive and does not always result in a person being sterile; it is entirely possible for a person to become pregnant while using testosterone therapy or after stopping it.)
I really hate on this website that we erased the term monosexism as it was a very useful term m-spec people have being using for years but terfs decided it was bad becuse it group them with straight people and all of you believed it.
Monosexism is the belief that people who are only attracted to one gender is somehow better or more superior to those who are not monosexual.
Monosexism seeing everything as only gay or straight and if your not you either lying or making things up.
Monosexism is erasing multisexual people are seeing them as less memebers in tge community.
Monosexism is seeing multisexual people are dangerous and dirty
Monosexism is seeing m-spec men as gay men who havent fully accepted themselves as gay.
Monosexism is seeing m-spec women as either lesbians or straight women depending on who your talking to
Monosexism is not seeing multisexual as a full identity and only half of something or on the way of realizing our ‘true’ sexuality.
But you guys all decided it was bad becuase terfs said it ‘group gays with the straights and that it was inherently evil for that.’ And you believed it.
“Sex positivity” can be a confusing name because it sounds like it means “sex is always great and everyone should have it”. I think a lot of people get misled by that.
It’s the antithesis of “sex negativity”, which is the idea that sex is uniquely powerful and dangerous and morally laden among all human behaviours. That there’s a special moral virtue in being ignorant about sex, a virtue that you lose when you learn about or have it. That you can be kind to someone, cruel to them, save their life, or kill them, but that won’t change who you are nearly so much as if you have sex with them. It’s the idea that outside of very specific moral boundaries, sex is fundamentally immoral and degrading, no matter how its participants feel about it. That it’s fundamentally wrong to feel sexual desire, to entertain sexual fantasies, to seek sexual pleasure, or to reach orgasm, unless you’re in one of the very limited set of moral parameters that make that okay. Those parameters are usually things like whether the people involved are married or in a committed relationship, whether they’re the right sex/gender, whether it’s for the right motivation (some people think “only for procreation” and others think “never for money”) and whether the sex act is one society approves of.
And there’s a very specific set of societal expectations: Of course everybody WANTS sex, that’s what’s healthy and normal, and unless you’re very weird or very special, of course you will try as hard as you can to enter a relationship like marriage where sex is allowable so you CAN have it. Once you do that, you basically owe it to the person you’re married to TO have sex. It’s because everybody wants sex so much that we need all these rules! Obviously WITHOUT these rules, people would run mad and make all kinds of big mistakes, because people can’t tell for themselves what’s right or wrong.
Sex positivity doesn’t take the opposite tack and say that sex is always good. Rather, its basic principle is that sex is ordinary.It’s like anything else humans do, like eating or sleeping or speaking or touching people. It’s value-neutral. People get to decide how they feel about it and whether they want to have it. If we make a society built on sex-positive principles, the average person will have enough information and empathy to be able to make the choices that feel right for them and others.
Sex positivity means understanding that if someone doesn’t want to have sex, that’s their absolute right, and it has the same moral weight as if they do want to have sex.
Sex positivity means that if someone has sex, the most important thing is whether they genuinely understand what sex is, what its risks are, what their rights are, and how to make it safe and pleasurable–and whether, knowing all these things, they have freely chosen to have this sex at this moment. The same goes for anyone else involved in the sex. Sex-positive sex with other people depends on valuing everyone involved; everyone involved has to be able to form their own opinions, make their own decisions, and have their own needs and wishes respected.
We don’t currently live in a sex-positive society. A society where being attractive or sexy is mandatory, where promiscuous sex is viewed as compulsory, and where people are shamed and punished for not wanting to have sex, is not actually sex-positive. And the sex-positive movement itself, sex-positive people, can miss the mark and fail to live up to their own principles, by not making space for people who need the freedom to express very different desires and boundaries.
The key to sexual liberation is not the “sex” part. It’s the “liberation” part. It’s about giving everyone the same freedom.
(Rules: If you want to argue with me you need to send me $20 to pay for the research and analysis it will take to seriously engage with you; otherwise, make your own post. No accusing me or anyone else of being a sexual predator without proof. No death threats, suicide bait, or invocations of harm like “I hope you die”/”somebody ought to kill you”)
