#shall we date satan

POV: you were damaged by discord

Happy birthday dear Satan

Satan the cat charmer

Why is MC so fucking funny-

Okay okay so fantasy pirates right?

Hybrids and magic orbs and all that. But the brothers + MC all seem to be human.

They’re also not related like usual and are just a crew that Lucifer picked up.

So being human and not related chances are they’re over a wide range of ages closer to what their personalities are like.

Since they’re human, their ages would be counted like normal people so Satan would be the youngest,

Aka Lucifer being closer to his 40s & Satan being closer to 18 (or something to that effect)

So imagine when Satan says this:

Lucifer is still his father. But he doesn’t know and Lucifer probably knows but he’s too emotionally constipated to say it but it’s partially why he got Satan on to his crew

The Drama✨

No but seriously. Imagine how pissed he’d be! There’s so much potential here.

Why’d Lucifer leave? What’s the treasure? How pissed Satan would be to find out the father he seems to respect so much is Lucifer? Imposter Syndrome as he questions the reasons behind Lucifer letting him join the crew? Bitterness when he realises Lucifer had known all along?

Add to that the magic & fantasy elements and the implication that MC & Mammon were together prior to joining the crew and are willing to go behind the backs of the others to find their own treasure

That’s a show I’d watch in a heartbeat

The books on cats are in the restricted section.

The restricted section can only be accessed by the student council or with permission from Diavolo.

Satan is extremely possessive about the cat books.

He even refers to the books as ‘his’ despite them being the library’s, which Mephisto calls him out on.

So the HC is:

Satan pulled some bullshit and managed to convince Diavolo to put the cat books in the restricted section because he wanted to protect them from ~✨the grubby hands of the common RAD student✨~ and he obviously knows no one on the student council will care enough to try & read them/check them out

Satan & Lucifer during Levi’s Birthday Event:

Satan: I’m embarrassed, ashamed, disgraced, mortified, humiliated-

Mc: What are you, a dictionary?

Mc: For this mission, I wore the perfect disguise to make sure I was never noticed by anyone. Something so drab and uninspiring-

Satan: I feel this is going to be a dig at me

Mc: I wore Satan’s clothes

Satan: There it is

Lucifer: Where’s Mammon ?

Mc: Doing stuff.

Lucifer: Don’t like the sound of that, where’s Satan?

Mc: Stopping Mammon from doing stuff.

Lucifer: Belphie?

Mc: Stopping Satan, so Mammon can do the stuff.

Lucifer: And you?

Mc: Distracting you, so Mammon can do the stuff.

Satan: how are you?

Mc: actually, I’m in a very bad place

Satan:

Satan: what happened?

Mc: oh, nothing

Mc: I’m just standing next to Solomon right now

Have you ever wondered what would happen if Mammon actually died? Like, what would happen if he just unalived himself cause of the brothers?

(Note: some might be a bit ooc.)

LUCIFER: would probably isolate himself in his office, only coming out if he absolutely had to (ex, make sure that none of his other brothers don’t off themselves), drowning his sorrows in demonus, talking to thin air,if you listen closely, you can hear him wailing and sobbing for Mammon to come back.

“Please Mammon… I swear I’ll do better, just.. Please come back”

LEVIATHAN: would isolate himself as well, seeing as how he insults Mammon the most, he’d probably feels responsible for Mammon’s death and blames himself everytime he thinks of Mammon, (Lucifer and Beel check on him the most since he has the probability of offing himself to).

“It’s all my fault, if I hadn’t called him scumbag all the time all the time…if I had been nicer, he’d be here”

SATAN: I don’t really know what he would do but he’d be most likely to be angry. When he’s alone, he’d start thinking about Mammon and start smashing everything in his room while crying his eyes out, collapsing on the floor and just sit there, regretting everything he’s ever done to Mammon, silently crying into his hands.

“ I was only joking…I didn’t mean any of it…I didn’t mean it, it wasn’t meant to end like this.. ”

ASMODEUS: from what I remember, he actually told Mammon to die (I think it was in one of the lessons), so going off on that, he’d feel the most guilt for his suicide, he’d probably turn to his sin and go around sleeping with countless demons to take his mind off his brothers death. But once he’s sobered up just laying in his bed, he’d hug his pillow tight, asking Mammon for forgiveness saying how he didn’t mean it while crying his eyes out.

“Mammon… I’m sorry okay?, I didn’t mean anything I said… I’m sorry… I’m sorry…please forgive me”

BEELZEBUB: would feel the most responsible for his brother’s death, he never really iniciated any of the bullying, but he didn’t stop it either, guilt and remorse would eat him alive, he’d probably stop eating for weeks but then would binge eat for days on end, Beel would check on his brothers constantly as to make sure no one else dies, he already lost two, he can’t lose another.

“I should’ve done something…I didn’t even try to stop them.. I’m sorry Mammon.. I’m so sorry”

BELPHEGOR: Another brother I have know idea, he’d know that dreaming of his dead brother would do more harm than good but I think he wouldn’t want to wake up, he didn’t want to face the reality that his big brother wasn’t there, he’d much rather dream of his big brother being there.

“I don’t want to wake up… You can’t make me…he’s not here… I can’t deal with it… Not yet”

————————————-

Hiya

This was in my drafts for awhile, I made this at like 1 am, I was half asleep so it’s not the best, its not proofread either so it might be bad idk ( ͡≖ ل͜ ͡≖)

Anyways I’m hungry so I’m gonna eat a sandwich.

Mammon: I have everything under control!

Satan: Is that why everything’s on fire?

The Brothers with an MC who’s kind but can be really scary and strong

This is a continuation of a previous ask, but with the other brothers as well. (Mammon and Asmo are in the previous post) Also a small spoiler with Belphie at the end so watch out for that

Lucifer

• He was totally misled by your initial kindness
• He first discovered your crazy strength when Mammon was arm-wrestling Satan and you asked to join
• Of course, they didn’t take you seriously and went easy on you, only to result in Mammon being flipped upside down and off his chair from the sheer force of your victory
• His pride is a bit hurt bc how the hell did a human like you overpower the second eldest brother so easily???
• He’s a bit more wary around you now but otherwise treats you just the same
• Will tell you off if you fling Diavolo across the room when he asked

Leviathan

• He found out during one of your gaming sessions with him
• You guys were playing a magic mmo game that basically took VR to a whole new level
• And this guy??? Starts trash talking you for no apparent reason???
• When you’d finally snapped, you wrestled the dude into a position he couldn’t escape from while verbally terrifying both the rude guy and Levi.
• Cue the iconic “Woooaaaaaahhhh”
• Levi is definitely scared of you now and hides in his room for the next few days until he’s certain big bad MC wont come to kill him anytime soon
• Once he calms down a bit, he’s drowning you with questions and curiosities.
• Whenever you guys are playing or watching a martial arts anime, he practically begs you to show it to him
• The dude is just fascinated and terrified

Satan

• He discovered it when you were out book shopping
• Someone had tipped over one of the bookcases, tipping them all over like dominoes
• Satan saw this happening with you in one of the aisles that was going to be crushed by book dominoes and was sprinted to you
• When you just held up the bookcases collapsing like no problem as you read a book while walking towards him
• When you were out of the danger zone, you just straight up dropped the bookcase and let it continue the demolition while still reading that apparently interesting book and walking
• Satan looks shocked at worst, but he’s internally panicking like
• Are humans supposed to be able to do that??? How did you keep so calm despite your almost demise??? No amount of human anatomy encyclopedias could have prepared him for this???
• He’s definitely intrigued and will ask questions
• He’s fricking making a journal about your strength right now with little tidbits and notes about what you can do
• He’s just a very curious boi

Beelzebub

• He discovered your strength and intimidation when you guys were at RAD
• Some demon had decided that stealing your sandwich would’ve been a fantastic prank
• Honestly, if you hadn’t pounced on him right at that moment, Beel would’ve
• Beel just kinda sits there nomming his own sandwich as you proceed to beat the crap out of the other demon as you attempt to regain your sandwich
• Once you get it back you just sit back down like nothing had happened
• He’s Shook
• Later he’ll be inspecting your arms n stuff asking questions like
• “How do such tiny limbs hold so much strength?”
• Will definitely ask you to workout with him so he can not only see how you got so strong but also to see your limits
• Overall very supportive

Belphegor

• He found out when you guys were taking a nap in the lounge
• You had woken up only to find that your bracelet had fallen off and rolled under the couch
• You then proceeded to lift up the couch like a sack of potatoes and get it back
• Belphie woke up on the couch that was not, in fact, on the floor and was much closer to the ceiling than he’d remembered
• He looked down to see you holding it up with one hand and retrieving a bracelet with the other
• He legit said “I’m too tired for this” and fricking laid down again
• He wakes up later to discover that was not a dream and immediately starts planning to use it to his advantage
• Whenever someone’s getting on his nerves now he just threatens to sic MC on them
• Otherwise he doesn’t really care
• Very perplexed as to why you didnt fight back when he killed you though

The Brothers as Random Texts I’ve sent in the last 24 hours

Satan: I’m not FUCKING ANGRY I’m just being a sarcastic bitch

Leviathan: I’m not good at insulting people BUT IF I WAS You’d be SO roasted rn

Beelzebub: Currently eating a tomato like an apple because I want to eat but I also need to be healthy

Asmo: How do I brag without sounding like a narcissistic bitch

Belphegor, replying: You already are a narcissistic bitch

Asmo: I know but how do I not SOUND like one

Satan and MC in a car with Satan driving: ….

MC: SATAN YOU NEARLY RAN OVER LUCIFER

Satan: SHIT I MISSED

MC: SATAN NO

Lucifer: * sees the fun activity being done by other people on Devilgram*

Lucifer: Ok, we’re going to put everything we love in this box as a family activity.

Asmodeus: Can I put MC in the box?

Lucifer: No.

Satan: Can I put MC in the box?

Lucifer: *sigh* No.

All the brothers and MC: …

Beel, picking up MC: Can I put-

Lucifer: NO!

Incorrect Obey me quote:

Literally any other brother but Beel, T-posing in the doorway: Good morning, parental figure.

Lucifer, without bothering to look up from his newspaper and coffee: Good morning, problem child.

Obey Me Max- Satan. 9/7/2020

Attempting to make japanese manga style because it been so long I haven’t draw like this and Satan is my husbando.

Deserted Island

Mc told Divaolo about how humans live the concept of living off the grid (like come one everyone played in the woods as a kid) so he set up a week long competition!

Teams:

Older bros:

- Lucifer

-Mammon

-Levi

Younger Bros:

- Satan

- Asmo

- Beel

- Belphie

Angels:

-Simeon

- Luke

Royals:

-Barb

- Diavolo

Humans:

- Solomon

- Mc

The rules are simple no magic! So how does everyone do?

Older bros:

- Did well at first Bc of Lucifer

- Their first objective was building a shelter

- They built a little stick and leaves hut but it could only fit two of them

- They made Mammon sleep outside

- When they were trying to go after a wild boar Levi tripped and scared all of them away so he got to eat the left over berries they found

- By the end Lucifer was tired, Mammon got a cold, and Levi got food poisoning from those berries

Rating: 5/10

Younger Bros:

- They did great the whole time

- The first objective was food

- The had plenty the entire time but their shelter was not much of one

- It was a fire on the beach with “beds” made of leaves and twigs

- It rained

- Beel had to be watched so he wouldn’t eat the food supply so satan did that thing you do with bears and tie it up in a tree

- It went fine until Asmo found something that resembled a mud bath and decided he needed a spa day

- It was quick sand

- Satan had to pull Asmo out but in the process Asmo lost his pants and he wasn’t wearing underwear

- So for the rest of the time Asmo had to kinda streak

Rating: 8/10

Angels:

- They made a shelter first

-Simeon and Luke found vines and wove them into makeshift hammocks and used twigs to keep it rain proof

- They played it pacifist route so they ate vegetarian for their time

- The adventures of Simeon and Luke were rather uninteresting until they ran into Asmo

- Simeon sat with his head in his hands for a solid hour

- Luke started collecting shells he found on the beach to take home

Rating: 10/10

Royals:

- Barb did most of it and Diavolo well…

- Barb found a natural spring and decided to build a small shelter around it and then went to look for- where’s Diavolo?

- Diavolo wandered off by the time Barb found him he had a boa constrictor wrapped around his waist

-“ Look barbatos the human ecosystem is truly wonderful *tightens* even if it is slightly painful”

- Barbatos: *he made this place and put snakes on it?*

- Barbatos got the snake off Diavolo (no snakes were harmed dw) and dragged him back to the shelter

- Then in the middle of the night he heard it. The unmistakable noise of his greatest foe…..a rat

- Barbatos got up and left

- He sat in the ocean for a awhile till Diavolo came and found him

- He refused to go back so for the rest of the time they had a beach shelter

Rating: 3/10

Humans:

- How do you think it went?

- Well surprisingly it was ok at first

- They climbed to the top of the island and made a shelter up there and found some local flora right for consumption

- They were mushrooms.

- Solomon and mc got a really bad trip and when they came to they were covered in blood and naked

- Not sure where their clothes went they found some leaves and made it “work”

- They we’re out looking for their clothes one day and found an abandoned camp

- Free stuff? Hell yeah!

- They stole it and brought it up to their camp out

- They had a little feast to celebrate

- Then things just went even more downhill

- They thought they were being watched ever since those mushrooms man

- Went full on Lord of the Flies

- Solomon and Mc even turned on each other

- By the time it was over Solomon and Mc were wrestling (still naked) in the mud yelling about moon soldiers

Rating: -10/10

Oh Baby…

(Fem Mc )

“How? How the frickty fuck did this happen?”

“Well”……

It all started with Satan wanting to prank Lucifer which is nothing new. He wanted a sure fire way to get back at his older brother for? Well for allowing “that hell hound mutt around the house but refusing one cat!” As anyone could tell you getting between Satan and his cats was lethal. He had already been fuming all week when he had student council business at the palace. He figured while he was there he would check out the restricted section of the library while everyone was busy.

They broke for a short 30 minutes to get up before the next meeting. His biggest worry was Barbatos but he seemed to have his hands full with Amso flirting with him so he took his chance. Saying he simply wanted to take a walk he causally made his way to the library. Since he was a Lord no one payed much mind to it was a cake walk. Once inside he found the perfect book “How to turn a demon into a Baby”. No

His plan was simple wait for Lucifer to walk in and catch him off guard with the spell. It was fool proof or almost that is because Satan underestimated one thing. That being Lord Diavolo who happened to come over that day. It was to late by the time Satan realized it was Lord Diavolo and not Lucifer who he directed the spell towards and well that’s why he’s holding a baby Diavolo in Mc’s room.

“You are going to get killed Satan!! Wait now you’ve dragged me into this so I’m an accomplice?!”

“Mc cal-“

“Oh don’t tell me to calm down when you turned Diavolo into a baby! We are so screwed man!”

“Mc be quiet only you and I know about this and if you keep yelling he’s going to start crying.”

“Fine…” (whispering) “What do we do? It’s not like Diavolo just vanishes on a daily basis”

“Let me think mc!”

“Think faster”

*Knock knock*

“You gotta be shitting me”

Pushing Satan and Diavolo into her closet and the knocking only grew more rapid as mc rushed to put her things in a somewhat normal looking manner.

“Coming”

Swinging open the door mc was met with an irritated glance from the Avatar of Pride him self. [shit]

“Uh hey Lucifer what’s happening?”

Mc said loudly so Satan could hear in her closet. She was also haphazardly blocking the door as to keep Lucifer from walking in.

“Mc why are you blocking the door?”

“I uh… why didn’t you answer my question?” Mc shot back

Sighing Lucifer easily pushed past and took a seat at her desk chair waving her over. Mc closed the door silently hoping Diavolo wouldn’t wake up and cause her room to be destroyed again.

“Mc why are you hiding Satan in your closet?”

“I uh what Satan’s not in my closet-“

“Mc I heard you talking outside the door”

“Shit”

Satan walked out of Mc’s closet holding baby Diavolo but at least he only looked like a regular baby.

“Satan why do you have a baby?”

“Well I-“

“We stole it!”

Demon hunters:

Damn I haven’t posted in a month my bad shawty

I’m so sorry I haven’t seen this before yesterday it’s not that I have a lot of requests I’ve just been busy. But onto the request

Until very recently most humans had not believed in demons or angels believing it to be no more than fiction. This rapidly changed once Divaolo opened up the devildom in hopes of peace between the three realms. This led to many becoming fearful and the church growing in size. Due to fear some humans who were backed by the church devoted their lives to destroying demons. Mc knew of the changes but was still shocked when visiting the human world.

Walking with one of the demon brothers past shops and stopping to look here and there. They wanted to take you somewhere they knew the others couldn’t tag along and ruin it for once however it seems the perfect day wouldn’t last. You both were stopped by a younger looking man with a crucifix in his hand. He started spewing prayers and whatnot and you could see your date wince some. You tired talking the random person down but they wouldn’t listen. Eventually seeing their prayers were not working the man walked closer and threw a rosary at the brother which seemed to burn the area it made contact with. Fueled by anger this stranger had hurt your boyfriend you used magic and hurtled them backwards. By now a scene had been created so you grabbed the brother and began walking away.

However the man determined to finish what he started pulled you backwards by your hair before you could realize what was happening. He pushed you to the ground where you hit your head among falling. Due to the stinging sensation and the blinding light of your s/o transforming it was a blur. One second a man stood in front of you and the next he was nothing but a pile of ash. The people around you screamed and ran in different directions some stepping on you. The brother simply picked you up and teleported the both of you to his room.

(Sorry if it’s short I’m kinda out of practice)

Obey me Tweets:

(Depending on how they do I might make more)

Dilfs

Mc(waking up Levi at like 3am) : so I just realized would Lucifer be a dilf?

Levi: mc what-

Mc: because Satan is his son technically…

Levi: I- I’m going back to sleep mc

*at breakfast*

Mc: *thinking*

Amso: Mc are you alright you look stressed?

Mc: I am just have an existential crisis nothing to worry about

Mammon: Mc?! Whaddya mean nothing to worry about

Mc: I am just coming to the conclusion that Lucifer is a dilf and I’m not sure how to feel about it

The brothers: …..

Mc: See it’s confusing wait-

Mc: would that make Solomon a gilf

Lucifer: Do I even want to know what you are talking about?

Levi: Probably not

First time posting in forever and it’s dumb shit anyway have a cat

ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ

My personal Obey Me Rabbit hole of theories

(Spoiler Warning for Lesson 36)

(So I haven’t updated in forever but finals are done and I’m on break so hopefully I should have more frequent posts now)

I like learning about things so go on a journey with me to learn about demonology and whatnot. So remember that post I made about the circles of hell? And how obey me has the circles according to Lucifer referencing them? Well I’ve found some more stuff.

So based on what the story and other characters have told us Solomon has made 73 pacts so far (I believe before coming to devildom) Going off this we can assume that our Solomon is based of the biblical character King Solomon. (I believe it’s said he’s king Solomon in one lesson but I honestly can’t remember which)

Why I bring this up is because in the mid 17th Century a book was published titled “The Lesser Key of Solomon”. It was an anonymously published series of grimoires about demonology. It’s where we get a lot of information about demonic rituals and practices. This book claims to have been written by King Solomon but considering it takes a lot of information from the 16th century it’s speculated if that’s entirely true. It tells us how Solomon got his powers and how we could do it as well.

The book is divided into five sections:

1.Ars Goetia- it contains descriptions of 72 demons King Solomon supposedly had control over

2.Ars Theurgia Goetia- The second part explains names, powers , and characteristics of 31 aerial spirts Solomon had summoned and controlled.

3.Ars Paulina- It was apparently discovered by the apostle Paul and has two chapters. Both chapters deal with angels and how you deal with them as well as their powers.

4.Ars Almadel- This part is basically telling us how to make Almadel, which is a wax tablet with protective symbols drawn on it. It tells us about seals and rituals if you want to summon demons and which angels to summon if you fuck it up.

5.Ars Notoria- Mainly comprised of prayers to attain knowledge for example. It also details the rituals you would need to practice.

Fuck now I forgot what I was thinking about

Uh let me know if you want more stuff like this I guess

Resident Evil: Village

(Bros)

*Spoilers*

Lucifer:

- He doesn’t get the big deal about some silly mortal game until mc dragsasks him to play it with them

- He spent ten minutes going through every tiny detail in the Winter’s home

- He did not like our wife Mia but he also didn’t know what happened in Resident Evil 7 so he’s really confused or the majority of the game

- Oh you know he loves the castle because like who wouldn’t

- He isn’t horrible at the game but he takes it agonizingly slow at times

- it took him ten minutes to leave the village once the gate unlocked

- Lady Dimitrescu is relatable to him honestly

- Does he find her hot? Well he doesn’t strike me as a milf connoisseur but I could be wrong

- He had fun playing the game but mc he has better things to do he just was sad about what happened to lady d

- Oh he hated the doll house area with the babies

- He really didn’t care that much about what happened after Lady Dimitrescu died same tho

- like I said before when we learn Ethan I like infected and died at the bakers house he doesn’t get it

- He would have preferred a different out come but hey he didn’t make the game

Mammon:

- Oh he hates this but gave him puppy dog eyes and he’s weak to that

- “Oh this is nice…fucking shit she got shot”

- Mammon wasn’t ready and since he wanted to get this game done with he didn’t do much investigating

- Dead crow… mc why… why must you do this to him

- Looks like he might actually cry

- No! More dead crows!

- He got up and left totally not to cry

- You promised him not more dead crows so he reluctantly agreed to play again

- That was a mistake

- He wasted all his bullets on the monsters for that cutscene

- Got attached to every npc we meet

- When he saw the castle his skills came in handy

- He was actually pretty good at running and hiding from enemies

- Did not like Lady Dimitrescu mainly because she scared him

- Oh a nice shack….

- Yeah after the baby monster thing he won’t pick the game back up

Levi:

- He’s played all the resident evil so he was the most competent at playing

- He may or may not have speed run it without you so he knows the story already

- Both of you want to be steped on by Lady Dimitrescu

- He doesn’t die once

- Doesn’t want to leave the castle

- You guys kinda just play around with mods for the game

Babysitting

Lucifer : Levi, keep an eye on Mammon today. He’s going to say something to the wrong person and get punched.


Levi: Sure, I’d love to see Mammon get punched.


Lucifer : Try again.


Levi, sighing: I will stop Mammon from getting punched.

Man ‍♀️

Mc: Yes I am a bitch just not yours

Solomon: Oohh yes get them mc

Mc: I’m talking to you dumbass

The Commercial

Solomon: Are you to short for respect to come to you naturally?

(Camera Pans over to Luke and Mc looking unimpressed)

Solomon: Well have I got the product for you now patten pending “Knife Hat”

Mc: I don’t know about this Solomon-

Solomon: Shhhh! Of course you do!

Luke: No Solomon you never told us what we came here for.

Solomon: (ignoring them) Knife hat solves all your problems! With just three payments of $19.99 it can be yours!

Divaolo, Simeon, and Lucifer watching from the corner: …….

Shower thought

So like remember how in um lesson 9 I think or whichever lesson it was here mc, mammon, satan, and Lucifer had to go to the human world? Well in that Lucifer said they could go through like the 9 circles but he doubts mc would handle it mentally. That’s a jab at Dante’s inferno (Actually it’s just “Inferno” by Dante Alighieri) right?

For those of you that don’t know it’s basically this dude, Dante, being lead through the “layers” or “circles” of hell. They get progressively worse the further you go down. The circles also are split up kinda between sins but not exactly because the first circle is just for those who were good people but didn’t believe in god or whatever. The last circle is for the traitors of history Lucifer/Satan is waist deep in a frozen lake of fire I believe (yeah it’s kinda confusing).

Here’s a good diagram of it I found on google

Anyway moving on from my explanation…. does that mean the “circles” exist in the obey me universe or was it a clever reference? I mean to be fair I’m lazy and I’ve been trying to get my cards leveled high so I haven’t progressed much in the story but I found it interesting. Plus learning can be fun right?

The Devil in luxury, or Satan in Satin lol. Yaknow ironically enough his head model was created long before the creation of the boxes, I was playing with Zbrush, started creating an elf or an alien like thing and then bit just sorta progressed into this devilish face. Really happy i was able to use him in my series.