#early morning thoughts
you fuckers need to understand that women don’t owe you sex because they went on date with yo ass.
“You know, it’s tomato tomato.”
She stares. Are they joking? “It’s toMAYto toMAHto.”
“What?”
“That expression. You said said tomato twice, but that’s wrong. It’s supposed to be both ways people say it.”
They laugh. “That’s stupid, there’s only one right way to say it.”
“Then why even use that saying?”
“Because, like there being only one right pronunciation, it’s my way or the highway.”
“You could have just said that—“
How to tell when you’re too tired to write and it’s way past time for you to go to bed:
ALT
my life is very small
yet still I feel remarkably lonely
Me: I wish Captain Kirk was real so I could hug him and actually feel safe and warm for once
Me 10 seconds later, literally crying: if Captain Kirk was real, he would never want to hug somebody like me
sleeplessly vibing with 2-years-ago me at 6am because what even is mental health or self care
You know how in Ocarina of Time, the people of Hyrule all experience seven years of Crap™ while Link sleeps in the Sacred Realm, and when he wakes up he realizes Ganondorf has taken over everything and the whole world has gone to hell so he has to fix it? And then at the end how Zelda hopes that sending him back to his childhood will allow him and everyone else to live the happy, peaceful lives they were meant to, implying that this time Ganondorf won’t gain power and nothing will go to hell in the first place?
OR you know how in Back to the Future Part II, Doc and Marty end up in the absolute nightmare that 1985 Hill Valley has become since Biff went back to ‘55 and gave himself the almanac, but then when the guys have fixed everything back in '55 the people of the original*/repaired '85 have no memory of Biff’s Hell '85™ because they never actually lived through it in their eventual experiences of the final/Real timeline?
…sometimes (no pun intended) I wonder if we’re currently living in the Hell Timeline or Hell Universe but our time-travelling hero just hasn’t fixed things yet before winding back the clock (maybe even flying around the earth to make it spin in retrograde??), resetting all our memories, and allowing us to wake up one day never having gone through the last [insert number] years.
(And then my head inevitably starts hurting )
How can I not even have the decency or energy to at least write a proper, timely response to a compassionate note of moral support from a friend? And when did these insipid, literally-every-damn-day thoughts like “I’m cold/lonely” and “I need a hug” gain the power to alter my physiological ability to function??
nothing much, just obsessively pining for you at 4:30 in the morning even though you’ll never love me, same old same old
can’t believe life peaked for me when an alleged Shatner/Kirk lookalike anonymously offered to hug me through the internet
no, that checks out… what I actually can’t believe is that I turned them down because I have no self worth
