#i need a hug
The majority of my smuts are going to be soft cause toru feels affectionate & needs affection
“Fázom, vagy csak az üresség az, ami ennyire hideg?”
- részlet a slamemből
Csak egy utolsó ölelést adj,mielőtt elmész
Hogy érezzem az illatod.
Dear Timothée Chalamet, I wanna hug you
Time is flying by too fast.
I blink my eyes and days go by. I can’t keep up with life. I want to do everything, but little things take too much time. Everything takes too much time. It feels like time is speeding up exponentially and I have no control.
_
Hmm…
- I’ve been single for almost 2 years (and most of my life besides that).
- I haven’t had a long hug in 2 years also.
- I don’t have any close friends, besides online friends I talk to sometimes.
- I somehow still get asked how I’m still single, considering I’m: “sweet, nice, cute, caring, smart”, etc.
I have the worst luck when it comes to love. I always feel like I love more, I’m more open, and give more effort than most people. I don’t know what to do anymore… I don’t know where or how to find the person for me.
_
Love is one of those things that always seems just out of reach for me.
I get a hint of it, but it goes away. Only leaving me with a feeling of loss.
I wish I could find/have the kind that feels right and always stays. I’d give my all for true love.
_
Not many people see me for who I am.
From a distance, I may seem like any other person. But once you know me and dig deeper, there’s more and more that make me stand out from the rest. I’m not like most people, I don’t aim to be. That’s what I like about myself.
When I feel feelings of love, it helps me show even more of who I am. The better sides of myself. The loving and caring side. But I need that love to express that, like plants need water to thrive.
So most people don’t see who I am, aren’t patient enough or maybe just don’t want an honest loving person. But that’s fine. I only want one person, the one right for me. Who I’ll give my all to and who’ll give their all in return.
_
*meets someone new*
*gets along well with them*
*thinks this is different maybe*
*starts to get hopes up*
*it all fails for no reason and I end up getting hurt*
*is definitely cursed*
*continues process over and over again anyway hoping maybe it’ll be better next time*
*nope, definitely cursed*
_
I hope one day I find the right person.
It’s hard to keep hoping though.
Since I’m still alone, after trying so hard and waiting so long to find that person.
I don’t want just anyone.
I want mutual, genuine, long term love.
True love is the hardest to find…
But it’s the only kind I want.
_
I want someone to give love to.
I want someone to love me.
Genuinely, loyally, mutually, and for a lifetime.
I want my soulmate. I hope she exists.
That is the main thing I want in life.
_
I want to be truly wanted and appreciated.
I’m tired of people using me to feed their ego.
I just want someone to fall in love with me, and me with them.
So I can give them love and I receive the same amount in return.
Mutual love, effort, honesty, and loyalty.
_
I want true love.
The kind where:
- We look forward to seeing and talking with each other.
- We can do nothing together, but it’s still the best day for both of us.
- We can cling to each other and feel the love flowing through each other.
- We can talk openly about anything and everything without being worried about saying too much.
- We hold hands while going for walks together.
- We can say “I love you” over and over again, yet it still makes us feel full every time.
- We stay together after hard times, and work together to get through it.
- The sex is from the love we have for each other, not from a temporary want.
- It’s based entirely on connection and the love for each other, not just material things.
- We can trust each other completely, knowing that we’ll be together for a lifetime.
And other things like that…
I want true love. I want my soulmate. I want the One for me.
_
I’ve been unloved far longer than I’ve ever been loved.
I hope one day it will be the opposite.
_
Everyone says you should love yourself before you can love anyone else.
Well, I do.
I love myself enough to know that:
- I deserve better.
- I shouldn’t have to be alone.
- I would be a very loving boyfriend/husband to the right girl.
- I shouldn’t have to suffer and have to continue this unfair life where I only see everyone else (even shitty assholes) get love besides me.
_
I want to be wanted as much as I want others.
I want to be someone’s favorite person, mutually.
But no matter what I do, I’m still always the side thought.
_
I’m considering just ending my life if I don’t find my soulmate in a year or so. Maybe less.
I’ve waited long enough.
All I’ve gotten is pain. No matter what I do. I’ve been lied to too often also.
I just want to find the right person. I don’t want to have to continue being hurt in this unfair life.
All I want is love. But it’s the only thing I can’t get.
Why bother living? There’s no point in life without love, as least that’s how I feel. I’ve felt that way my whole life.
_
I give everything. I just want honest love. Full love for a lifetime.
I just get hurt over and over again. I keep saying “maybe one more chance” for someone else. But it just hurts more and more with every betrayal.
I don’t think I’ll be able to continue much longer.
I’m reaching my end, or maybe I’m already there.
_
Life is always just waiting for good things to happen that never come.
I hate living in this reality.
_
Why am I always:
The one waiting for someone.
The one who misses them more.
The one who loves them more.
The one who does more for them.
The one who’ll do everything for them.
?????
Why do I always feel like an afterthought?
I want what I give.
I deserve better.
_
I want to be wanted, loved, and appreciated by the one who I’d do the same for.
I never felt that yet fully. Only brief moments.
I want long term. I want a lifetime with the One.
_
Me (for years): I want a girlfriend or at least some hugs.
Life: *global pandemic and worldwide quarantine*
Me: okay then… I see your answer, life. Touché
_
