#incorrect mcu quotes
Peter: How did you find your meal, Mr Stark?
Tony: It’s good, decent. A little cold, though.
Harley: You know what we meant.
Tony: Asking Peter to web it to the ceiling doesn’t mean it’s hard to find when you’ve got pasta sauce dripping from the ceiling.
Peter: I’m good at identifying birds
Tony, pointing to a pigeon: What bird is that?
Peter: …Sam
Steve: *sets kitchen on fire*
Bucky, panicking: WHERE’S THE RESPONSIBLE ADULT?
Steve: HE’S SLEEPING ON THE COUCH
Bucky: WATER, GIVE ME A BUCKET OF WATER
Steve: passes him a bucket of water
Bucky, walking out to dump the bucket onto Sam: the kitchen’s on fire
Steve, walking into the room with a signage around his neck saying ‘Good things’ :
Tony, following after Steve with a similar sign except his says 'Small Packages’:
Peter, packing his bags: I hate this household
marvel writers confirming that bucky really only likes 40’s music & marvin gaye is the thing that will keep me going for the rest of my life
Peter: MJ isn’t here. Right now i’m the best student. I’m going to be the velociraptor.
Tony: are you trying to say “valedictorian”?
Peter:…no…
Ned: hey mj, are you a morning person?
Mj: ohh yeah. Totally
Peter: do you not remember what happened this morning
Mj: what happened this morning …?
*Earlier*
Peter: *hugging mj from behind* I love you
Mj: Don’t touch me, I’ll slit your throat. Try me.
Steve: Don’t you think you’ve had enough!?
Tony: Don’t tell me I’ve had enough coffee!!! You don’t know me!! Maybe I LIKE TWITCHING!
Steve: TONY WHERE DATING!
Y/N: Steve, what are you doing?
Steve: I’m drawing a map
Y/N: But… that looks like my eyes?
Steve: I often get lost in them
Y/N:*blushes*
Steve: Y/N, what does IDK, LY, and TTYL mean?
Y/N: I don’t know, love you, talk to you later.
Steve: Ok, I love you too, I’ll just ask Peter.
[wedding day]
Y/N: i do
Avengers:awww
Y/N: or do i?
Avengers:oooooh
Steve: Hey Y/N. Can you hold this for a while.
Y/N: *not looking* Sure! *lends hand*
Steve: *intertwining his fingers with Y/N*
Y/N:
Steve:
Y/N: I don’t know how to tell you this, but… I love you.
Steve: That’s great, Y/N. Especially considering the fact we’ve been married for 6 years.
Steve: [Carrying a lot of bags]
Y/N: [Showing hands to help Steve with the bags]
Steve: [Puts all the bags in one hand and with the other one holds Y/N]
Y/N: That’s not what I wa– Okay.
Steve: I fucked up. I fucked up.
Y/N: Why? What happened?
Steve: I’m falling for someone.
Y/N: Damn. Must be special person to make Mr. America to fall in love.
Steve: *looks at Y/N lovingly* Yeah, real special.
Y/N: [burst into the room and slams door shut clearly panicked]
Steve: oh my god, what did you do?
Y/N: NOBODY DIED!!
Steve: WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT?!
Y/N: It’s quite dangerous here, do you wanna hold hands?
Steve: *takes Y/N’s hand while blushing*
Tony: We’re in the supermarket.
Steve: N/N, can I talk to you for a minute?
Y/N: Ooh, Someone’s in trouble!
Y/N:…
Y/N: It’s me. I don’t know why I did that.
Bucky: We all know you’re in love.
Steve: I’m not in love with Y/N, shut up.
Bucky: I never said who.
Steve:
Steve: Shit, okay, hold on, JUST LISTEN—
