#schizoaffective disorder
My book is about my experiences with psychosis and all the bullshit I’ve dealt with because of it. It’s also about just learning to heal. I think my story is an important one, for myself and others. Please reblog this link if you can. There is a $15 dollar ebook option for those who prefer ebooks or don’t have much money. You are also able to just contribute a few dollars if that’s all you can do. Support from the wonderful mental health community on tumblr, the one that I’ve been part of for so long, would mean the absolute world to me!
It will also include some of my art, some of which has been reblogged on here countless times.
https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/asking-for-empathy?create_edit=true#/
The time has finally come. I’m now in the pre-order stage of my memoir. If you can contribute it would be the world to me. Please share this with everyone you know, and please, reblog. My story is important to me and I believe meaningful to many others. Thank you so much in advance!
My book is available for preorder!
If you are interested in purchasing a copy of my book please click HERE to secure a copy while they still last!
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schizoaffective disorder has been a wild fucking ride. I’ve seen/dealt with so much bullshit because of it. But for years I’ve been hallucinating my childhood cat every time I’m very upset or not doing well. And it’s the most beautiful calming thing in the world. And that’s not the only beautiful thing I’ve ever had happen to me because of schizoaffective disorder and some days I just need to remind myself of that.
Just hurt both my wrists stimming. Fun times.
and yes people with schizophrenia stim
Despite these wild times, I am still on track to publish my first book. It’s an incredible and difficult experience, writing about your own life, and remaining honest forces you to confront yourself on many levels.
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Whenyouchoosetosupportpeoplewithpsychosisyoudon’tgettopickandchoosewhoyousupport.Youhavetosupportlower-functioningandunstablefolkstoo.
Here’s a really cool discord server i run, it’s open to anyone who experiences psychosis, we’ve got lots of cool stuff including channels for LGBTQ+ people, people of color, selfies, and food prep. We’re also working on our blog psychosis-spectrum.tumblr.com (Still in early stages of construction) and organizing a weekly online movie night (With frequent random movie sessions during the week).
tschziofeel when you discredit all of your symptoms because you don’t experience vivid or consistent hallucinations.
that schizo + complex PTSD feel when everyone who shares the same name(s) as your abuser(s) is out to get you.
I am a fifty one year old black man who grew up in project housing units of Cincinnati Ohio, which were stricken with poverty and high crime. I evolved from a dysfunctional family setting. My mother was a single parent to me and my older sister and was labeled throughout the neighborhood as being a “Tom Boy.” I inherited a brainiac trait from my mother and excelled in my education during my childhood years. Peer pressure and being lured into a fornicating setting before i reached puberty by both sexes (i am currently heterosexual), caused me to develope a mental deficiency and become diagnosed by a state psychiatrist with having Borderline Personality Disorder. My brilliancy, being a black minority, and level of society i am currently in has caused me to be outcasted.
I began having delusions and hearing voices and thinking I was being followed at age 16, during my junior year of high school. Oh yes. I was crazy. I thought everyone was after me: the KGB, the CIA, the FBI, the Mafia and the space aliens, not to mention some of my friends and acquaintances. I was paranoid about my mother and attacked her. I went from a straight A student to not being able to read a book because my mind was to distracted. Luckily, I met Dr. DiFrancisco. He asked me to try some medication. The first drug I tried was Stellazine. It was a miracle worker. I have always done very well on the older medications. I have been taking thiothixine, which is generic for navane since 1981. It works the best for me with minimal side effects.
I know I have been warned about tardive dyskinesia, but there is some price to pay. I like to sleep, as I have all along the years. I still need 12 hours most days. But that has not kept me from getting married, getting a bachelors degree, and a masters degrees. I have always worked and now draw retirement and work part time. However, I do not have children, which is fine by me. I enjoy my nieces and nephews. I enjoy my high school and young adult students studying for their GED/HSE. Recently, my psychiatrist, actually a PA who has much knowledge, but is not a specialist in my area, asked me to try Latuda. The only reason I considered it was the pharmacies locally were not supplying either thiothixine or navane. I was beside myself. The six months of going down hill and frightening my family after all these years was not good. Thanks to God or whoever heard my cry to keep the thiothixine in stock at the local CVS was renewed. My subscription is no trouble to refill at this time. However, I am pretty much beyond most stigmas for schizophrenia. I just hate to let anyone at work know. There is definitely a feeling of incompetency that co-workers will put on me, even though I am doing the same thing, they just want to believe I am exhibiting symptoms.
Anyway. I feel it is time for me to be much more proactive on behalf of the mentally ill like myself. I am especially desperate to make sure they never take away my medication that works so well for me. I would like to contribute to NAMI and other special needs organizations. I am also looking for a legal advocate, in case something happens to me and my family can not make the best decisions. Myself and my family will need professional advocacy as I continue to get older.
Thanks for reading. I look forward to sharing some of my insights over the years. For example: the devastation of facing the truth that I would have to take medication the rest of my life at age 18, and how I figuratively swallowed that pill. I also have been persuaded to go off my meds at very times. That did not last long; good grief! I have also tried thorazine, haldol, moban, geodine, and respiradol, in addition to latuda. Amen to taking Navane or its generic, thiothixine. I am now age 59, a widow in recovery steps. Cheers!
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Long story short, the Pasco County Sheriffs Office, which has been involved with evidence and witness tampering in the past, is still involved with not only that, but RICO Act violations, which has been alleged in the past as well. They did not learn from their past “mistakes” and are now doing it to me.
I can prove it, but I was not permitted to tell my side of the story.
Up to my current situation, I have always admired police.
I have submitted my evidence to the proper federal authorities. In the meantime, I have a Calendar Call at court tomorrow. I had to fire my lawyer for being incompetent, for ignoring exculpatory evidence, not even lifting a finger to help find a witness who will tell the truth. I can only submit the documents that the lawyer neglected to do. I am alone with this, and every day is agony and despair because of these liars. I bounce back occasionally, but I bounce a shorter distance with each recovery. Don’t know if I will survive this, so just an FYI: Be careful who and what you support and call a “hero”. There is nothing heroic about collusion tampering with evidence in order to get a man incarcerated.
After years of substance use, abuse, and binging I have drug free and clean for almost 16 months. I had stopped many times but relapsed many times also. Today my life differs from what it used to be. I know I have a mental condition which has improved with medications and psychotherapy. I cope with life differently by talking to my real friends, family members, and professionals.
I want to share my experience with you to let you know there is help for recovery and healing. You just have to ask for help when you need it
I have experienced dark days in my lifetime and I know dealing with a mental illness can be stressful and draining. It is important to trust someone to ask for help.
Hi. I have Schizoaffective disorder. I’m new here to Nami and looking for someone that can relate to me. I feel all alone and lonely. Is there anyone out there?
Me when folks are only just now calling Barry fucked up after he starts showing psychotic symptoms and not while he was merely, you know, murdering people.
TW/CW Suicidal ideation
My psychiatrist: What things are you looking forward to that help combat your suicidal thoughts?
Me:
Psych: … Anything else?
Me: Not really. I know some people think it’s silly to care so much about them, but I figure if it keeps me around for one more day, that’s what matters.
Psych: That’s right. And I look forward to new shows, too. I’m glad you have that.
Me:
