#this is a joke
My only complaints for episode 3 are as follows:
- Vax didn’t do that stupid farmer voice Liam did when he got caught in the briarwoods bedroom
-Lady Briarwood didn’t fall flat on her face when jumping out the window
okay my turn. dni if you: hate pink, are a dog person who is really weird about hating cats, are a cat person who is really weird about hating dogs, have ever seriously referred to hozier as a fae king/forest god, enjoy tumblr purple prose, have ever owned a poetry book written by an instagram poet, are good at video games, have ever been/are considered a “fandom leader”, hate thunderstorms at night, take your coffee with no milk or sugar, or had a witchcraft phase
This is what having a Samoyed is like
This video is FAKE you can tell bc she’s dressed head to toe in black and has dark colored furniture a real Sammy owner would NEVER
the whole “dress/fashion up is for girls” is so funny to me bc historically men love their silly lil themed outfits and accessories. cowboys and their leather heels and bandana handkerchiefs and spurs and hats. pirates n their slutty v necks and jewelry and belts and buttons and silk sashes. aristocrats with their wigs and decorative canes and nylons and embroidered overcoats. modern men r probably so unhappy bc they’ve never dressed more basic / boring and r ignoring hundreds of years of their fashionista ancestors yelling from the afterlife at them
Not me thinking about the fact that at one stage, Pietro wanted Luna to be called ‘Moonee’
The idea that anyone could actually be aroused by it is astounding to me. The Simpsons are the most thoroughly un-erotic characters ever designed. I feel like nobody actually draws Simpsons porn, it just manifests in this plane like some sort of psychic waste product.
How have you watched The Simpsons without seeing marge even once
Hey Lapis took Stevens advice and ‘Dropped’ the barn off at the beach so her and Peridot could be near the temple it may be destroyed but hey it ok
“Do you want to see my pecker???”
*puckers my lips and pecks you on the corner of the mouth* my lips!!! hahaha.. jokes for days - Lame joke Dujour - eUë
“I scream..”
“What’s that little buddy?”
“I scream..”
“Well you just go on and scream then little buddy..”
“I SCREEEEEEEAM!!”
“Oh, you want ice cream?”
“Yes please.”
Hahahaha.. I thought it was funny - Lame joke Dujour - eUë
Okay so like, what’s with YouTubers and boxing matches? Like out of all the ways you could fight for views, y’all went with….boxing?
You know what I’d like to see (if I were actually interested in shit like that)? Proper duels. I’m talking swordfights. I’m talking gladiatorial brawls to the death. I want people playing war horns and cannons in the distance as two random dudes with a social media following try and battle each other like their family’s honor depends on it. I want witty banter and one-liners being thrown back and forth while the crowd screams for blood.
If you’re gonna fight people for the sake of views and money, go all out. Make boxing look like child’s play. Or just….don’t fight on the Internet for views. Have some class you ridiculous little mortals.
I’m going to guess it tastes like shit!
Seriously, who the fuck eats this shit?
all the knowledge of the sixth and camilla hect decided to go with abstinence-only sex ed huh
important PSA for theatre kids:
do not tell people what shows you are in or what role you are playing. why? because you can typically look up exactly what theaters/high schools are performing any given show at any given time. if they’ve paid for the rights, you can find it.
if you say what role you’re playing, someone can look at public cast lists OR your theater’s/castmates’ public instagrams until they find your name and/or account.
unfortunately most people don’t seem to be aware of that (I wasn’t for a long time either), so I want to warn you all of that. I love talking about the shows I’m in as much as the next person, but that information is incredibly easy to track and it needs to stay off the internet (or at least within small discord servers, not on publicly searchable sites like tumblr) for your own safety.
did ya’ll know I’m gonna be playing Annie B in SIX on the west end?
✨first performance is tomorrow lovelies✨
project sekai writers when they use the trope of yelling at the shy/sensitive character and making them run away at the same point in all of the group stories
its actually canon that jack was in the logang sooooo
anyone need a sugar baby bc i need an audible account ASAP
ill send feet pics pls
Do you ever just look at someone and think “I’d love to lick Hot Cheeto dust off your fingers.”
Would you look at that. Destiel didn’t go canon again so now white fascist terrorists are staging a coup
I never understand it when people make modern lotr AUs that perfectly mirror the real (usually western) world. Like, if we had elves and dwarves and so on, can you imagine the discourse?? Do elves have “immortality privilege?” Is it insensitive for them to make references to it where mortals can hear? Is it problematic that hobbit communities literally cannot fit non hobbit occupants and are therefore exclusionary? The heated debates between elves who lived through a historical event versus a mortal who is very sure that actually they know better what happened back then, thank you very much. Friends, it would be a trash fire.
*Anything bad happens*
Me: “Alexa play ‘Sign of the Times’ by Harry Styles”
listening to radiohead is an autistic trait
A beleaguered citizen, caught up in the machinations of a world content to treat him as disposable
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