#tua five

five: i hate you with every inch of my being

diego: thats not alot of inches

klaus: *cackling* you should NOT have said that

diego: -no offence.

five: none taken, I wasn’t listening to you.

the delores/five realtionship was simultaneously the healthiest and unhealthiest relationship in the series, in the essay i will—

klaus and five are both the wine aunts but consider:

five as the classy red-wine aunt who could kill you with a raised eyebrow

klaus as the actually addicted aunt who is just the butt of all the jokes- oh wait

thats just the plot, sorry ignore me

my headcanons for the hargreeves siblings:

luther- straight, also never bothered trying anything else bc thE MOON

diego- bi boi, he just likes b a d a s s e s

allison- straight but girls are super pretty and she’d try it out if the right one showed up

klaus- ultimate pan, also open to a poly relationship bc he rlly likes comfort cuddles

five- he’s ace, bc after all those years alone he just can’t deal with people and hasn’t ever been interested

ben- gay but he died too early to ever have fun

vanya- biromanic but in all honesty, pretty people scare her and she’d rather not

five on his sixth cup of coffee at 4 in the morning: this is the life.

-Umbrella Academy-

Finished watching S2~~~  

five: i told you, i’m fine. why the hell do you keep asking?

allison: you had ten cups of coffee in two minutes

dave: so how do you feel about all this? about us?

klaus, checking his mood ring: uh, i feel green i guess

diego: god, i hate everyone in this fucking house

luther: you’re in the house you know

diego: bitch i said everyONE not everyTEN

diego: klaus, why is there a horse in the living room

klaus: he wouldn’t fit in the kitchen

diego: that’s not what i- whY the FUCK is there a goat in the bathroom?!?

klaus: he was bullying the horse! what else was i supposed to do??

klaus: if i punch myself and it hurts, am i weak or strong?

vanya:strong

diego:weak

five: an idiot is what you are

dave: i love you

klaus: *holds up uno reverse card*

five: i’m off dessert

also five: *eats sixteen peanut butter and marshmallow sandwiches in two seconds flat*

klaus: well, change is inedible.

five: i think you mean inevitable.

klaus, spitting out a quarter:nope

police officer: license and registration, please.

klaus: okay, here

police officer:

klaus:

police officer: this is a monopoly ‘get out of jail free’ card

diego:bitch

luther:blocked

diego: wait, unblock me i need to tell you something

luther:unblocked

diego:bitch

TUA season 1: The Hargreeves kids make poor decisions.

TUA season 2: The Hargreeves kids make poor decisions as a family.