allison: i know we don’t get along, but i got you this bath bomb as a peace offering. whenever you feel stressed, just run yourself a bath and throw this in. i promise, all your worries will be gone in seconds
klaus, quietly: spooky scary skeletons send shivers down your spine
five:
klaus, steadily building volume: shrieking skulls will shock your soul, seal your doom tonight
five:
klaus, screaming at the top of his lungs: SPOOKY SCARY SKELETONS SPEAK WITH SUCH A SCREECH YOU’LL SHAKE AND SHUDDER IN SURPRISE WHEN YOU HEAR THESE ZOMBIES SHRI-
Hi hi! I’m relatively new to the whole blogesphere, but I’ve seen a lack of Vanya love so I wanted to go ahead and make a place to post all about Vanya! I’ll probably take some time to get going, but soon I’ll be a blog dedicated to Vanya Hargreaves!
some fucker: “If you arent paying for a product, you are the product!”
me using tumblr costing yahoo a billion dollars:
good
Say what you will about Tumblr but it’s rather punk that capitalism has no power here. That we cannot be turned into products and are free to roam the tundra and scream into the woods about whatever like some primal beings.
Look, I hate this hellsite as only someone who has been doggedly here for 8 years, through countless ill-advised updates, unannounced blog deletions (THREE! THREE BLOG DELETIONS!), random bullshit, barely functioning user interface, cutesy staff messages, failure to fix infrastructure, the Pornpocalpyse and “Female Presenting Nipples,” and all the other constant nonsense this website has heaped on its long-suffering userbase can possibly hate it.
But guess what? I’m still here, and so are the rest of us grizzled old-timers, because we cannot even be killed with fire. We aren’t here to be famous and have bad takes go viral (I mean, there are bad takes aplenty, but only your fellow dumpster denizens see them), or we would be on Twitter. We aren’t here to post updates carefully curated so our racist uncle can’t see them while he is sharing his QAnon bullshit, or we would be on that ACTUAL hellsite, Facebook. We steadfastly hate showing our faces or anything of the sort, or we would be on Instagram.
Instead we are here, like a bunch of rabid trash opossums, mercilessly mocking every update and reverting it with xkit, memeing the obnoxious Boys ad out of existence after like… 48 hours, sitting on our garbage heaps of fic and hyperfixations while costing capitalism and mega-media-corporations a literal billion dollars and being impossible to market to in a social media landscape that is otherwise nothing but ads (seriously, have you met YouTube?), and I for one think that is rather sexy of us.
In the great words of one Klaus Hargreeves, “I’m sexy trash”
