I feel as if my whole life has set me up for disaster. That every day has been a push towards the edge. Every breath is buried with burden. The mornings are filled with guilt, I swallow my words for breakfast, drink my sorrows whole. The nights are meant for battles, sinking into sheets, dread mixed with dreams. Hope slips through my heart, gets lost in the broken cracks. I am clinging to loose threads, dangling over the darkness. Each passing minute is a moment spent with misery. All the years of wasted youth, the ghosts of who I’ll never be, all trail behind me. The hauntings of never really living, the reality that this world has only offered me wreckage; it’s a truth I’ve carried in my throat for far too long. So I’m stuck coughing up the chaos, growing in the gloom.

Isabel Cabrera

“It’s okay.

Saving me was never your job anyway.”

~ colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat

Of course she has a loud voice, of course she is always yelling, because at home no one is listening to her.

~ colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat

It’s weird to think that in this very moment someone is lying alone in their deathbed, balancing between life and death or reuniting with an old lover, tightly wrapped in a warm embrace or writing a suicide note, pondering different ways to say goodbye, right in this moment someone’s heart is fluttering from a first kiss and someone’s is breaking from a goodbye.

~ colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat

“And then I felt sad because I realized that once people are broken in certain ways, they can’t ever be fixed, and that is something nobody ever tells you when you are young.”

~ Unknown

“I’m beginning to realize how little I mean to everyone.”

~ colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat

“I’m that person everyone replaces after a while.”

~ colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat

“Have you ever wanted to cry, and no tears came out. So you just sit there, quietly, and feel your heart break into tiny pieces while everything crumbles around you.”

~ colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat

“If this is how my life is going to be, I don’t want it anymore.”

~ Unknown

“People keep telling me that life goes on, but to me that’s the saddest part.”

~ Unknown

Do NOT blame suicidal people for wanting to die

• They can’t help it.
• They are in a kind of pain you can’t even imagine.
• The last thing they need is more guilt.
• They trusted you enough to tell you, don’t guilt trip them.
• If you don’t know how to help them, please ask a professional for advice.
• It takes much strenght to survive suicidal thoughts. They are strong but they need help and support. 
• It is NOT their fault, nor yours. They just need support.
• Suicidal pain is exhausting and they only want to rest. Try to understand, not blame them.
• They need professional help.
• They are not selfish.
• They are ill.

“I already said too much. I already shared too much, and I want all my secrets back. I hate getting close to people these days, I always regret sharing too much, caring too much, doing too much, feeling too much.”

“Never have I dealt with anything more difficult than my own soul.”

~ Unknown

“Life is shit.”

~ Me, 2020

“Never create sunshine for people who leave you in the rain.”

~ Unknown

“If you could go back, would you? I heard you say you want to erase the last six months . . . but if you could, would you, really?”

Would I?

~ Anna Todd, After We Fell

“The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.”

~ S. Maraboli

“My thoughts are all over the place as I fall asleep, and images of clouded roses and angry green eyes flow through my dreams.”

~ Anna Todd

“At some point you will realize that you have done too much for someone or something, that the only next possible step to do is to stop. Leave them alone. Walk away. It’s not like you’re giving up, and it’s not like you shouldn’t try. It’s just that you have to draw the line of determination from desperation. What is truly yours will be yours, and what is not, no matter how hard you try, will never be.”

~ Unknown

“Roses are red, violets are blue,

sugar is sweet and perhaps so are you.

But the roses have wilted, the violets are dead,

the sugar bowl’s empty, your wrists are stained red.

The sun isn’t shining, the sky isn’t clear;

there’s no silver lining cause you’re no longer here.

Rain keeps on pouring, there’s no end in sight.

you’re laying there frozen, so far from the light.

Your beauty’s unreal, your smile the sun,

but time can’t be turned, nor actions undone.

The words that you wrote that only I read;

“I love you so much; please don’t cry when I’m dead.”

A bond that we formed, a love that ran deep,

a pain that we shared; a friend I could keep.

I wanted to hold you, wipe the tears from your eyes,

been there the moment you said your goodbyes.

I want to forget, but most times I don’t.

I want to let go, but I know that I won’t.

Tears on my face, memories burned in my head;

The roses are wilted, the violets are dead.

~ 4 am thoughts, Unknown