#2am thoughts

I promised myself I was done with u, I wish that was true. I wish I could just fucking forget about you.

That night in the parking lot you looked at me and I couldn’t stop thinking about the end of us.

This isn’t even poetic, it’s just the truth. I wish I never fucking met you.

There are things I wish I never told you about me. It hurts to know you will have parts of me for the rest of your life. But I guess I have parts of you as well, and I don’t want those either.

its a monday night, im sitting in my bed thinking. 

about us and how we ended 

and I’m well aware i dont need you 

i just miss you, and I’m lonely, 

and iv bad mouthed you to all my friends 

but they don’t have to know if you come over this weekend. 

i know you hate me 

i kinda hate you too 

but if you could just hold me one last night 

we could put all this shit aside 

and stop trying to hide, that we both miss each other.

dont try to deny it, because i know you do 

i see you watching my snap stories 

because that’s the only app you have where i havent blocked you.

so what would you say, if i called you up one day?

and asked you if i could stay the night. 

would you say ok? or would you hang up the phone. 

I’m so scared to call because what if you answer? 

would you say your sorry and say i deserved better?

i guess it doesn’t really matter anymore

but i still think about it sometimes. 

so tell me, if i called you 

would you pick up the call?

-writingforthesad

I haven’t written a poem in 4 months, if I’m being honest I’m not sure I even know how to anymore. Iv been in this sate of melancholy, where im awake but it feels like I’m sleep walking. And I think iv been seeing ghosts, I’ve been seeing you everywhere I go. I thought I saw you in the grocery store the other day, but I hope this haunting never goes away. And iv been replaying the things you said. I say them over and over in my head. I wish that I could hate you more consistently, because You have the best parts of me. I know I need to move on, and I’m trying so hard to, but deep down I hope I haunt you to.

Sometimes it feels like I take up too much space

Like my presence annoys others, like I don’t quite fit into place

I’m either too loud or to soft

I don’t talk enough or I talk to much

No matter what I do I can’t seem to please you

It gets so exhausting trying to be

Something for everybody, I just want to be me

But I’m stretched too thin and I work to much

I keep giving away parts of myself and it’s never enough.

I look at you and for a moment forgot about the whole world. In that moment it’s just us and nothing else matters. And I knew that if you ever left, that would be the death of me.

Don’t look at me like that

I’m already falling way too fast

Don’t smile at me like that

I’m already way to attached

I think I made you worse in my head

Amplified the things you said

Cut you off

cause I heard she was in your bed

but I should have just asked you instead.

I assumed, and that was wrong

But saying goodbye was easier than holding on

-writingforthesad

Been dipping back into My Little Pony after all these years. It’s still funny! 

Side note, look at this Applejack I threw together in like 20 minutes. How the hell does my muscle-memory still know how to draw these fucking creatures so fast, and yet it takes me like an hour to draw a human face: something I see and draw every day.

Anyways AJ stole my entire heart

“And then I felt sad because I realized that once people are broken in certain ways, they can’t ever be fixed, and that is something nobody ever tells you when you are young.”

~ Unknown

“Do you ever get that feeling when you’re sitting in your room alone, your thoughts wander, you’re not crying but you just feel sad and empty, replaying moments from your life and wondering. Where did it all go wrong?”

~ colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat

“I’m beginning to realize how little I mean to everyone.”

~ colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat

And although i couldn’t love you for eternity, i have loved you with my entirety.

they said it gets easier but they lied.

Do you ever hold your breath while you’re sobbing so no one hears your cries?

I just want one happy day. One day without remembering why I am in so much pain. Just one day without this heartache.

Being alone with myself is so hard

Why am I here if no one even asks me to stay?