I’m such an awful person.

Im a terrible girlfriend, daughter, friend to those I don’t have. I’m just an all round awful, terrible person.

I want to disappear forever.

They deserve much better than me.

Knocked me out, was happy for a moment

//24.02.2022// tc, depression, anxiety - 4 years later

Well… hi? Is anyone here?

There’s no chance that this post will reach people who knew me 3, 4, 5 years ago. But I just feel the need to look back to my tc years from time to time.

I posted here for the first time in 2018 when i fell for my teacher, but i won’t be telling this silly story once again, you can just check my #tcc tagged posts. What I wanted to focus on is the mental health matter.

While reading my old posts i feel like helping the old me. Two years of crushing on a teacher, two other years of missing her and just a year of curing my mental illness. You know, as a kid I had no idea that i didnt think stright not becouse of so-called “forbidden love”, but due to depressive thoughts and anxiety. I felt so hopeless and lonely that my mind just picked a person to fixate on. Neither me nor her had bad intentions. And now, as an adult, I can’t really remember if i acted like a psycho or not.
I’ve been curing my disorders (depressive moods, anxiety, derealisation) for a year now and im shocked that I made it through back in 2017-2019. If it hadn’t been for the good people i met (including my tc), i’d have been dead.

And even though so many years passed I still dream of explaining everything to her and i know it’s where my ego takes control over common sense. But i just feel fucking bad for what i’ve done and said and that i could be perceived as crazy. I wish I could wash my stupid childhood acts off and tell her that she was and always will be great. But texting her would only make it all look worse so i just keep silent.

My message: If u feel depressed, stressed, s*icidal - please, do it for me and seek help before it gets worse. There is NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU. It’s an illness that can be cured.

To all people i met here when i needed help - i love you,
forbidden-feelingsss

nimzamona:

I’ve posted an idea of this before, but I never made it its own post, so here.

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It’s a good idea to have something physical to help with depression or anxiety so you can hold something when you’re upset, rather than have to think about the spell you cast. Put some of these stones, and herbs in a small bag, stuffed animal*, or pillow.

Stones:

• Smoky Quartz
  
• Jet
• Lapis Lazuli
• Amethyst
• Rose Quartz
• Amber
• Citrine

Herbs/Plants:

• Morning Glory
• Lavender
• St John’s Wort
• Cinnamon
• Mint
• Feverfew (make sure they’re not allergic to grasses for this)
• Catnip
• Chamomile
• Marshmallow

*Stuffed animal is a good idea since you can get a small one, open the back, fill it with the dried herbs and stones, and then stitch it back up. When you’re sad hug it. The herbs and stones will help you feel better, and it’s always better to have something to hold when you’re sad.

$0.99 Sale ~ Whip Smart by Siena Noble

$0.99 Sale ~ Whip Smart by Siena Noble

Escaping her past is hard. Falling in love is even harder…
Teresa Bodnar is desperate for a fresh start. Scarred by her relationship with her cruel, controlling, and so-called “dominant” ex, she escapes to her hometown of Pittsburgh. Determined to move forward, Tera makes a bold move: founding the first club in the city to act as a safe haven where her most secret desires can be fulfilled.
But…

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