You never loved or even fucking liked me you just used me for your happiness then threw me away when i wasn’t doing my job right. But little did you know you juat saying hi or good morning to me made me so happy. But now all I do is cry and wish i was FUCKING DEAD. I hate you so much. Or I want too. But you’ll always be my happy place. And i fucking hate it.
Summary:Reader feels lost, and she finds comfort in the arms of someone she didn’t expect.
Warnings:depression, suicidal thoughts, implied attempted suicide (very light, only if you squint real hard)
Author’s Note: When I started writing this I was in a very bad place. I started wirting it because I felt exactly as reader feels in this fic. And this was my only outlet. Daydreaming as always. It helped a little fantasizing that my very own Bucky would comfort me in my darkest days, so I decided to share this with you all. I hope it helps those who need it, if only a little bit. You’re not alone. Don’t forget to reach out for help. Attempting against your life is never the answer, guys. You matter. You’re important and people do care. We don’t have to live through this alone. And I know it isn’t easy. And I know it can’t be cured with a fanfiction. I know.But knowing people care, sharing the way you feel with people you love and people who love you does help. It makes things easier, lighter. And if you ever need to talk to someone, you can always come to me. It gets better, guys. It really does. Stay safe. I love you all <3
my depression got really bad (back in November) and when I read about the sleeping (all the time), bottling my emotions, constant tears. I didn’t even have the motivation to walk out of my room.
it reminded me of that, but reading this made me realize that I’m getting better. I’ve gotten help since then, and I feel happy. I’m starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Thank you for this.
This brought tears to my eyes. I totally get what you mean, and getting out of it is the hardest thing ever. Realizing you’ve got depression is easy, but getting the strength and willpower to seek for help is hard af. I’m glad you’ve gotten help since then. I’m glad you decided to get help. And I’m so glad, like you have no idea, that you’re finally starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Thank you so much for reading something so close to my heart. And thank you for leaving such wonderful words about it. You’ve made my day ❤️
Quando mi dissero questa parola il mio cuore si fermó. Poi, preso da una scarica di adrenalina, battè più forte come a voler uscire fuori dal petto.. Come a voler andare a risanare il suo male che sentivo forte come fosse di mia proprietà.
Sometimes I get scared of being too happy and excited about something because every time I get really happy, something bad happens and I end up disappointed.
I know you’re sad, so I won’t tell you to have a good day. Instead, I advise you to simply have a day. Stay alive, feed yourself well, wear comfortable clothes, and don’t give up on yourself just yet. Until then, have a day.
Do you know when you find you’re on the edge? When one day, for some stupidity, tears come to your eyes. When one word too many, an insignificant gesture hit you deeply. It does not mean being frail or weak, but having endured too much, too long.
I lied and said I was busy. I was busy, but not in a way most people understand. I was busy taking deeper breaths. I was busy silencing irrational thoughts. I was busy calming a racing heart. I was busy telling myself I am okay. Sometimes, this is my busy, and I will not apologize for it.
I already said too much. I already shared too much, and I want all my secrets back. I hate getting close to people these days. I always regret sharing too much, caring too much, doing too much, feeling too much.
If only this anxiety didn’t dictate all of my thoughts morning until night, a constant reminder to be afraid, to not get too comfortable because danger is always there, waiting, ready to strike at any moment.
Have you ever just sat with your friends realizing you’re the least important friend in the group and that it wouldn’t make difference if you were there or not?
