#tw ed thoughts

i’ve binged. and then cut myself. great. i thought i was finally over this, but i guess i never will

all i need is a flat tummy for fuck’s shake

the amount of food i’ve consumed these past few days is insane. fuck family gatherings

i’m so tired of having to face the same problems over and over again. like seriously i’ve been struggling with my body image and relationship with food for 3.5 fucking years. i’m actually starting to believe that i will never escape this. fuck

i need to stop making up excuses to eat all the time… like fuck. how will i ever lose that weight, if i just keep stuffing my face??

what if i was skinnier?? you’d like me better then, wouldn’t you?

i feel so ashamed of myself right now and the only thing that can comfort me is starving

where’s my morning skinny??!!

i am bloated af. thanks, period.

my face is all puffy and massive and i fucking hate it

I NEED TO KEEP ON LOSING WEIGHT!!!

after all this time i’ve started feeling dizzy again. that means i’m doing fine, right?

my scale doesn’t work. like seriously why does everything go downhill? fuck

Today’s calories : 1389

will i ever escape the 4 digits?

why do i make everything so complicated? like why can’t i just eat a fucking meal and move on with my life or eat when i’m hungry and stop when i’m full? why can’t i just be normal??

Today’s calories : 2214

i just want this to be over

i binged. i’m so fucking ashamed and disappointed of myself. i wanna scream, but i can’t ‘cause they’re going to hear me and think i’m like insane. fuck

You know how when you stand up n you dont necessarily get “dizzy” so much as your vision gets a little speckled with tiny tiny black dots n you hear this ringing that drowns out all other noise n you have this strange pressure in your head till it goes away?

Yay!

⚠️TW - Vivid and Visible Bones In Pictures⚠️

Let me know if this is crossing the line because I WILL take it down if anyone feels it necessary

OkNOW I’m at 115lbsfinally

Through rigorous and exhausting exercise and countless sleepless night and 4 years of this bullshit I roughly have the body shape I want

Now I just need to proportionally lose 15-20 more pounds. Thinking rationally I know that wont happen perfectly so maybe another 4 years of this bullshit will finally get me where I want to be :,)

▪︎Been trying to take consistent body checks over the past week n I just dropped my phone on my fucking eye socket bones and I’m HEATED

▪︎I also cant tell how much I way anymore and I’m so mad. My mom is leaving sometime at noon tmr/today so thank gOD but I’m so scared…