I wrote the following six years ago when I was 15, my dad was abusive and my mom ignored it I just found it in an old notebook. A child should never feel this much pain and fear. Someday I hope I can make this little girl proud.
Yellow Oak Tree:
The sun is hot and burning
The earth is cruel and harming
Fear surrounds the innocent
Can nothing be saved?
But as I lay beneath you shade a cloak of serenity cascades around me
It’s 2AM and I just cut all my hair off because I felt my life spiraling out of control yet again and I wanted to and I wanted to feel in control again. Now I’m kinda freaking out but I also kinda love my new hair!
ID: several full body colored digital drawings of chenelo from the goblin emperor with different clothing designs. she is a young, thin goblin woman with gray skin and dark, long, voluminous curly hair 1) wearing a scarlet long-sleeved dress with a deep orange kirtle layer. she wears blue earrings and her hair is pinned at the sides, the rest down. 2) wearing an all-white outfit, a billowing dress with a high waistline, embroidered bodice, cape, and train. there is a blue jewel at her collar, and she wears blue drop earrings and a blue head piece. 3) wearing a simple light blue dress that ends above the ankle, barefoot, and a darker blue open coat that comes to the waist. her hair is in a simple ponytail. 4) wearing a red dress with embroidered trim that comes above the ankle. over this she wears a deep blue cape bordered in gold thread embellishments and tassels. she is barefoot and her hair is down. end ID.
Gatsby wasn’t in love with Daisy. When they first met, he was, but over time he fell more in love with his perception of her than Daisy herself. We know this.
He was truly in love with Nick. Think about it. Gatsby never told Daisy about his past. He never even told her his real name.He did, however, feel an inclination to tell NICK. He only knew Nick a short amount of time, but almost immediately he’d told Nick more about himself than anyone he’d ever known.
Gatsby was in love with Nick, but I don’t think he knew it. I think he still believed the feelings he had were for Daisy, and the reason they were so intense was because she was so close, and not because Nick was next to him the whole time.
poterti rivedere, magari solo il tempo di stringerti forte al mio cuore e sussurrarti tutte le parole, che il tempo troppo breve non mi ha dato modo di poterti dire.
I can think of none. No apology would be enough. I’d beg forgiveness if I knew that would…but it will not. I fear nothing will assuage your grief.
It’s been 4 days, little love. 4 days, and you have neither eaten nor drank anything. Is this what you meant by having no hope? You lie there, prostate before me, like a dead thing. Indeed, something died within you that day, did it not?
You do not yet know, nor understand the bond I…what would you call it? It was not accidental, exactly.
Hmm…haphazard. Yes.
The bond I haphazardly made when I kissed you…it’s the only thing keeping you alive right now.
And the reason for that is because you are…not draining, but…ah. Siphoning. You are siphoning my strength, and I…I have never felt these feelings before.
You see, little love…I can feel what you feel.
I confess I…I have never felt things like hunger or thirst before. I have never felt humiliation, nor grief, nor guilt quite like this. So overwhelming. It crushes me.
And well it should, I agree, after what he did.
What…we did. Have done.
We never should have come back.
Seeing you lay there and not caring when I touched you…it confused and worried me. You usually fight back. You yell, or have a witty retort on tiny, delicate lips.
Now…nothing.
Not even when I stroked your back with my finger. Not even when I lifted you up and sat in front of the hearth. Well, it may not be a hearth as you understand it, but it is a source of heat, light, and comfort, especially in the Winter weather this part of the world.
I settled there with you, and…again, what else could I have said?
All I could do was cradle you against me, and say I am sorry.
And I am. It was my fault. All of it.
T’was my fault my brother killed her.
You likely don’t know that part. Or that I am the youngest of twenty-four. Or that I will have to face my father tomorrow.
He will punish me, and quite severely, at that. True, he did violate one of our laws involving Lessers.
We do not eat the ones with whom we can converse and mate. That is, those who are nearly on par with us in intelligence, or have the potential, at least.
My brother told me of a black market where that went on anyway. I had no idea that he actually encouraged it, or helped to run it, until after I saw him…do what he did.
Now I know why it nobody else seemed surprised or outraged by the…news.
Fascinating word, news: North. East. West. South. Clever, so clever of you adorable beings!
My father likely knew.
And chose to do nothing.
Why?
Because he loved his son.
His son. The Crown Prince; that’s what you would call him.
I must face my father tomorrow, little love. I fear I may be separated from you forever. If that happens, we will both die.
For now, I am grateful to have you with me, if just for a little while. Just a little while, Myne heart, let me sit here with you on my chest. Let me pet you an hour more.
At last, I hear your cries. Your entire body quivers under my hand. Such anguish you must have held within!
You can’t stop. I am trying to hold still for you, but I can feel your sorrow as though it t'were myne…mine. That was why I too, have tears.
That, and fear, such as I have never known.
We never should have come back.
I am so sorry.
Forever your servant,
Aureus
(Ah, that is the closest translation to my name, actually. And it means Golden, as You said my eyes are like. I pray you find that more fitting, little love.)
