Reminders for people who haven’t had relationships yet:
There’s no time limit for having your first relationship. Not having had one yet doesn’t mean you never will.
Try not to compare yourself to others. It’s not a race, and other people having had relationships before you doesn’t reflect upon you at all.
It doesn’t make you unlovable - it just means you haven’t had the luck that others your age have had to be fortunate enough to meet someone they click with.
Your value is not based upon your relationship status. You are whole and lovable and valuable regardless of whether you’ve been in a romantic relationship.
You are still young and you still have so much time to find someone. Even if you’re in your late teens/20s etc and feel that you’re much older than others who have already had relationships, don’t forget that in the grand scheme of things, you’ve barely begun and you have so much opportunity in the future to meet the right person/people.
Especially for LGBTQ+ people - it can be much harder to find relationships as a teenager than it is for cishet people because the dating pool is smaller and it can be harder to find tolerant/accepting environments. It doesn’t make you unlovable or mean you won’t find anyone, and your dating history or lack thereof doesn’t invalidate your sexuality.
Other forms of relationship are just as important, if not more so, than romantic relationships. Platonic love and affection are just as important and valuable, and you are not without love just because your love isn’t romantic.
You don’t have to rush into anything because you feel there’s a clock ticking down. There isn’t. There’s absolutely no shame and nothing lesser about you for not having dated anyone yet, and there’s no need to rush or force anything.
You are a lovable, valuable, deserving human being, and your relationship status does not impact that in the slightest.
Romantic love isn’t the only kind of love that matters, and I feel like there would be fewer people who feel unlovable or alone for not having a romantic relationship if the importance of platonic relationships was given more credit. As well as fewer people getting into unhealthy relationships or relationships they aren’t ready for because they’re so starved for affection and think a romantic relationship is the only place to get it.
Platonic love is so important. Platonic affection is so important. Tell your friends how much they mean to you, tell them how much you care about them, tell them you love them. If everyone’s comfortable with it, it’s okay to be physically affectionate with your friends. You don’t need romantic love to be whole or lovable, you don’t need romantic love to get the affection and validation you deserve.
Self-love is a difficult thing to achieve, and it’s easy for others to preach it but putting it into practice is a journey that can take a lot of time and work and relearning the way that you think about yourself.
So remember that you’re not failing by not being there yet. You’re not wrong or inferior for struggling with low self-esteem or mental illness that can make loving yourself really difficult. Self-love and self-acceptance is a process, and what matters is that you’re somewhere along that road. Even if the only thing you’ve done so far is take that first step by acknowledging that self-love is a goal you’d like to achieve some day, even that is a massive achievement, and a really important step to take.
You don’t have to compete against or compare yourself to anybody else - their accomplishments don’t diminish your own, even if their timeline is different from yours. The only person who you should be aiming to be better than is yourself from the past.
here’s a secret: you’re not annoying, I promise! even when you talk about your feelings, even when you ramble on about that thing you found that makes you so happy, even when you need space and have to take time for yourself. you are always loved, even when you feel like you’re at your lowest. no one is judging you for thinking about yourself sometimes. you’re not selfish for taking care of yourself.
this isn’t all that there is!!! there are sunsets you haven’t seen, people you haven’t met, things you haven’t learned, food you haven’t tried, and places you haven’t visited. life is so much more than what you’re experiencing right now, and there will always be new things coming. there’s so much more out there for you!!
not eating means no energy and no energy means not being able to play with small doggies bc ur too weak so please look after your bodies ok do it for the doggies who want to play with u
do you ever just wanna hold someone so so tight and make them feel okay and heal all the pain and hurt in their heart, fill them up with so much love and make sure they never feel sad or broken again
if you were truly a bad person, you wouldn’t be so hung up on the morality of your mistakes. the fact that you want to go back and make it right means you’re growing from this and you’ll try to do better next time.
