“Sometimes you don’t realize there is underlying trauma until it surfaces to the top, and you wonder where it’s been all along and why it resurfaced when you were getting better. But that’s when you realize that it’s a test that must be passed, a wave that must be surfed and a scar that must be filled. And once it’s all passed, you can begin to heal again. And you realize the beauty that you can always, always heal again, and again.”
“If you drown, allow yourself to feel the depth of the ocean. And then resurface when you know that’s the deepest you can ever go. And promise to never to go beyond that.”
And today I want to apologize to myself. Apologize for giving up too early, for hating my skin when it was protecting me. Apologize for starving myself when my body was dying. Apologize for falling off the wagon constantly. I want to apologize for every single pain i put my body through. Apologize for making it feel as if it wasn’t worthy enough for me because it is and always will be. And today may not be the day I will want to return to it with everything within me. But I want to let it know that I’m coming back to it slowly by slowly. And I want to thank it for accepting me.
Hope today is fun and peaceful rather than difficult for you all <3 If you’re working today in the health, emergency or social services we appreciate you!
hellooooooo i have had this account for three years and havent posted for over two so i am making a comeback (and u may not see me for another two years lol lets see how this goes). here are some rough biology notes i did for a test last week! they aren’t complete, as you can see but they are the best of what i’ve done in a long long time. look below for list of stationery i used!
i’ve been struggling a lot more than usual with my mental health recently - depression and anxiety/ocd wise - and i’m struggling so much to keep going but i’m just about plodding on i guess. it was around this time last year that i almost got forced into hospital and my eating disorder was at its worst. and i feel like i have not got anywhere over the past year because i’ve almost ended up in hospital twice in the past month and feel like i’m getting worse every day but at the same time i just can’t tell because i’m so phased out??? i feel like this ended up as some kind of rant lol sorry
supplies in this picture:
a4 rhodia dotted notepad
zebra fude brush pen medium
pentel fude touch brush sign pen
muji polycarbonate ballpoint pen 0.7mm
muji acrylic mechanical pencil 0.5mm
(ps i’m trying to get up and running again so i would appreciate reblogs etc!!!)
hellooooooo i have had this account for three years and havent posted for over two so i am making a comeback (and u may not see me for another two years lol lets see how this goes). here are some rough biology notes i did for a test last week! they aren’t complete, as you can see but they are the best of what i’ve done in a long long time. look below for list of stationery i used!
i’ve been struggling a lot more than usual with my mental health recently - depression and anxiety/ocd wise - and i’m struggling so much to keep going but i’m just about plodding on i guess. it was around this time last year that i almost got forced into hospital and my eating disorder was at its worst. and i feel like i have not got anywhere over the past year because i’ve almost ended up in hospital twice in the past month and feel like i’m getting worse every day but at the same time i just can’t tell because i’m so phased out??? i feel like this ended up as some kind of rant lol sorry
supplies in this picture:
a4 rhodia dotted notepad
zebra fude brush pen medium
pentel fude touch brush sign pen
muji polycarbonate ballpoint pen 0.7mm
muji acrylic mechanical pencil 0.5mm
(ps i’m trying to get up and running again so i would appreciate reblogs etc!!!)
