#lonely
Dear diary… (Trigger warning)
I hate how a single chromosome can fuck up your life.
I just wish I didn’t have a body at all.
Dear diary… (Trigger warning)
I’m not actively suicidal, and I haven’t been in a while.
But the thoughts are still there…
They still haunt me the same way they always have.
I guess after so many years of this… I’ve become sort of numb to it all.
My mind still wants me dead… And I know it’s only waiting for me to break down again.
Dear diary… (Trigger warning)
I guess my eating disorders are not as bad as before, but…
Food feels like some kind of threat to me now.
I’m afraid of not eating, because I’d end up going back to the same habit of fasting and trying to eat as little as I possibly can.
But I’m also afraid of eating, because I know at any moment I could end up binging, and then purging.
I hate both. And it’s so hard for me to find a middle ground…
Dear diary…
I can’t see well…
And now with a treatment the doctor gave me… I can’t hear well, either…
I swear I’m going insane now…
I hope you fall in love with the person more than the idea of love
-Daniel Sloss
“You don’t always have to tell people you love them. You just have to give them no reason to doubt it.”
— irishjulienne, saying i love you is not a habit
“The great thing about this life of ours is that you can be someone different to anybody.”
—Jennifer Niven, All The Bright Places
“Wanting to be someone else is a waste of who you are.”
—Kurt Cobain
And when Taylor Swift said
“You were all I wanted,
But not like this.
Not like this.
Not like this.”
Do you ever hold your breath while you’re sobbing so no one hears your cries?
I just want one happy day. One day without remembering why I am in so much pain. Just one day without this heartache.
Being alone with myself is so hard
Why am I here if no one even asks me to stay?
Every time I chase happiness I come back worse than before.
I feel so out of control
no matter what I do, this pain always follows me. I just want my heart to stop hurting.
You start to feel so drained when you constantly reach out for help and no one gives you their hand.