“Sometimes you don’t realize there is underlying trauma until it surfaces to the top, and you wonder where it’s been all along and why it resurfaced when you were getting better. But that’s when you realize that it’s a test that must be passed, a wave that must be surfed and a scar that must be filled. And once it’s all passed, you can begin to heal again. And you realize the beauty that you can always, always heal again, and again.”
“You taught me how to love, forgive and care. You taught me how tough it could get and all the despair. You taught me my first words and how to eat, you made me everything I am, and I will ever be. Life seems dull when you’re not around, but with your one smile, everything turns around. You’ve given so much and asked for so little, you’ve sacrificed your dreams to make mine achievable. All my love and actions in this world will fall short in comparison to yours; it will take me a lifetime and many more to reciprocate yours. If I have only one wish, I hope that when I am born again, I have you as my mother all over again. because mommy, no matter where I am, I love you a thousand times more.”
in my mind’s eye, you’re frozen in time, in place not even revolving, never evolving
taxidermied, preserved, stuffed
until the next time we meet, face to face and you ask me to reassure you, learn you all over again
this time: i see you
you look soft and spiky, like a tumbleweed happier drifting with the wind and your thorns but when you latch on to your chosen rock, they’re stuck with you, more often than not…
because you’re endearing, as much as you’re wearying.
again, you ask me to reassure you i hear you
you said: i’m ready to bloom and i said: let me take a step back, and you can have the room and i wait it seems i’m always waiting on you to let go, to latch on to latch on to me, preferably… ha!
instead, i see you grow i hear you, and i know
it’s my problem, not yours but i’d like to cultivate my roses, too and i can’t do that if i’m letting you still my room, waiting on you to see me and the space that i need.
One of the important steps in our evolution will be to let go of our clinging to the economy. Or at least the economy as it exists today.
In the economy as it exists today, we have incentive to monetize everything… and this has slowly crept into our relationships, our food, our health, our willingness to offer our own gifts to the world, even our access to nature.
I’m not saying money is bad and we should avoid it. Money is inherently neutral. Some of the beliefs we attach to money can be harmful - that we aren’t safe without it, that life can’t be full and rich and beautiful without it, that it factors in to our worthiness in any way.
Economics measures how much money is getting passed around. When we walk our own dogs instead of hiring a dog walker, we are “not contributing” to the economy. When we watch each other’s kids for free, we are “not contributing” to the economy. So don’t worry if the economy is contracting a little or a lot. Maybe we are just sharing more, being more self-sufficient, or realizing that we don’t need more items.
Wishing you all feel safe in a time of “economic uncertainty” and also wishing you financial evolution to go with your spiritual evolution, whatever that may mean to you. xoxo Nikki
Podcast! The lovely @samamorningstar invited me on her podcast, Writing From The Womb. Listen in to hear poetry readings and discussions about dismantling and cyclical creativity. Plus, I share and read from my newest project for the first time!
Please have a listen wherever you listen to podcasts, and subscribe to Writing From The Womb to hear more from womb-inspired writers. You can also watch the video on YouTube - linked below. Happy listening! ❤️❤️
I love the analogy of the sun as consciousness. Consciousness is the sun, and we are all rays of the sun. Some rays might shine a little brighter, but it doesn’t matter! It’s not a competition because we are part of the same sun.
And maybe some rays awaken and realize, holy crap guys, we are sun, and some rays might be like, I don’t believe in the sun. Doesn’t matter. The sun has infinite patience. But someday when we all realize we are part of the sun, we might realize how powerful we really are.
Shine on like the beautiful rays of sunlight that you are. ☀️ xoxo Nikki
Art found on Pinterest - Retro Starburst from Art.com
[So excited to share that Dr Christiane Northrup, a well-known women’s wellness author, shared my book on her Instagram! I greatly admire her, and especially love her book Dodging Energy Vampires. So cool! I sent her the book one year ago, so I was surprised to see her post about it now. Amazing ❤️]
Book sneak preview - Murmur Rumble Roar: Poems About Climate Change. Available on Amazon worldwide.
By Nikki Tajiri @nikkitajiri on Tumblr and Instagram
Hi Tumblr!
In honor of Earth Day/Month I’m going to giveaway this book for free! The giveaway (probably the last one for awhile) will be from April 21 to 25, 2021. Just hop over to Amazon and download the Kindle version.
I would love for you to post an Amazon review to tell me what you think about it. The book never really got momentum, so I would love to hear your thoughts either way.
The very first poem I wrote for the book. From my book, She Dreams When She Bleeds: Poems About Periods now available on Amazon. Link in my bio.
Words and art by Nikki Tajiri @nikkitajiri on Tumblr and Instagram.
My book sales have picked up recently! Thank you all for your support, I feel so grateful and honored when someone chooses to spend their hard-earned money on my book. Hope you are all safe and hopeful. - N
I want to write about the things and feelings I felt too guilty to write about before. The times I felt broken, the times I felt I didn’t get what I deserved. But I didn’t want to admit it. Not to myself, not to anyone else. It’s okay to admit people aren’t perfect…it’s okay to let them go. I knew, if I admitted all these things, I’d have to face reality. That the people I love and adore, the reality of who they are is not equal to my opinion of them. I didn’t want to say that before, I wouldn’t even let myself think it. But I want to grow and mature, thrive, become the person I want to be. And I can’t do that if I can’t even be honest with myself.
I’m going to be the most obnoxiously loud happy person this world has ever seen because I spent ten years consumed by suffocating depression and I am damn proud for overcoming it and I won’t silence or stifle myself for anything or anyone anymore.
