#im so sorry
Part of my Middle Earth redesigns.
Nienna, one of the Valar, holding the last cuttings of the Two Trees in her hands.
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The Valar’s designs are based off a variety of our oldest civilisations and cultures. Nienna’s starting point comes from illustrations of new kingdom Egypt and Berber headdresses, among other influences. I still wanted to introduce some colour to her, so I went with sort of mostly chromatic greys, rather than outright stark greys.
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hey guys, i hate to do this, but i could use some help rn. so the person who owes me money just got approved for a loan that will cover everything that they owe me, thanks to a friend of theirs that works at a bank. the problem is, they’re still in the negatives and can’t access the loan until they get out of the negatives. and i can’t really cover it myself. so if anybody is able to help us out, i would be eternally grateful. any bit helps.
so update: im almost certain im being scammed by this person. i thought the loan thing was shady but i gave them the benefit of the doubt up until i called my bank and they said that loans larger than 1k are rarely if ever granted to people whose account is negative. and on top of all that, im officially all out of money. so until i can get the fraud shit worked out with my bank, i need a lot of help. i got plenty of bills coming up and im currently in the negatives. thank you for your help.
Riku: You can’t catch me, Gay Thoughts!
Ansem, possessing him: Oh yes we can
Get Fired Up, Deadpool.
↳ “Sounds like you got a dick in your mouth.”
Certe volte dico tante di quelle cazzate. E faccio soffrire le persone talmente tanto. Vorrei piantarmi un coltello in gola e smettere di sprecare ossigeno. Tutto questo potrebbe migliorare - se solo riuscissi ad essere una persona diversa. Se solo non fossi… me.
Voglio morire. Voglio solo smettere di fare così male a tutti coloro che amo.
And today I want to apologize to myself. Apologize for giving up too early, for hating my skin when it was protecting me. Apologize for starving myself when my body was dying. Apologize for falling off the wagon constantly. I want to apologize for every single pain i put my body through. Apologize for making it feel as if it wasn’t worthy enough for me because it is and always will be. And today may not be the day I will want to return to it with everything within me. But I want to let it know that I’m coming back to it slowly by slowly. And I want to thank it for accepting me.
- g.d (welcome me home)
“The sea is only as powerful as you allow it to be.”
- g.d (the sea)
“You give and give, only to realize that there isn’t much left to give. So you shut doors and learn to heal, learn to give to yourself. Only to have people say you’re being selfish. But then retort and say “Fuck you, I am still going to give but to myself first."”
- g.d. (i’m important as well)
“Depression is when you’re sitting in your room and you can hear people laughing and all you can do is listen in to their laughter and not bring yourself to feel happy with them. It is when you’re angry at your mom for brining you into a world to only want to escape it (even though it’s not her fault). It’s when you just want to cry but can’t because god forbid someone saw tear stains on your cheeks. So you just sit still in hope that the numbness will pass, and that you make it through the day. When all you want is to sleep and not wake up ever again.”
- g.d. (what depression is)
“Sometimes people forget how hard it is to go about your day. How hard it is to just love someone who loves you. When depression hits you, you forget everything, you forget that you’re loved and you love someone. Because its this piece of shit that reminds you constantly that you are not worthy of the love. That whatever you set out to do won’t be enough because you are not enough. I feel this constantly. Some days I’ll be fine but days like today, breathing even crying feels like the biggest task in life. So, I want everyone to know, that this will pass and one day we will look back and realize that this had to happen, to let us become who we are today.”
- g.d (this will make us weak before it makes us strong)
“I realized that I want to be a warrior. I want to be Athena. The goddess who fought for herself, who had a ‘manly’ body and still loved herself. Who is known as the most courageous warrior. I don’t want to be Aphrodite anymore, I want to be a warrior. I want to be Athena.”
- g.d (become another warrior goddess, become Athena)
the bread was…very soft…apparently
Omg guys im so sorry ive been not posting for so long my depression and anxiety has been acting up a lot lately and I still haven’t gotten anywhere with therapy. Ive been wanting to post for so long but …. I just don’t know what to post or scared to because…. what if no one likes it or what if it’s a stupid post or something like that….. my social anxiety has been making me scared to post in fear of getting judged and things …. im so sorry guys!!!
Sorry ive been completely inactive
Im so sorry guys …… that I haven’t been on here for so long ….. my depression and anxiety is getting completely out of hand again. Im just really in a bad place right now . I feel awful about not posting and things…. I fell like I should just force myself to push my feelings down so i can post for you guys because I really really hate to not post anything. But i also don’t want to burden anyone because I honestly suck at hiding my feelings and I don’t want to put all my problems on you guys so that’s why ive been inactive. Now i cant really promise you that I’ll post soon because I don’t know how long im gonna be like this ….. ive finally gotten a therapist and i got back to her in three weeks so hopefully she will help ,but until then i may not post and…im just so sorry guys I just really really don’t want to bother you all by venting out my problems to you because that not really a good thing ….. if i do i might beat myself up for it later for being weak and letting my weakness show ….. I really really hate to do that even tho i do it everyday to my family…… I feel so bad for them that they have to deal with me and my illnesses……. ugh i wish i was better at hiding this so I won’t burden them …….. ok so I just wanted to explain to you all why I haven’t been posting because you all deserve to know and im gonna stop this before I start to spill any of my feelings or thoughts. But i want you all to know that im truly sorry for not being strong and posting for you but instead letting my emotions get the best of me and prevent me from being active. Again i am so sorry…… remember i love you guys so much and I hope you can forgive me for my selfishness.
i’ll never abandon this blog ever because i love it so much but just know…. im really into twisted wonderland so
Pain is only relevant if it still hurts
I forget like an elephant
Or we can use a sedative
And go back to the day we fell in love just on our first kiss.
Ed Sheeran- ‘U.N.I’
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First of all, I’m not a huge shipper lol, not that I dislike it because I definitely like to, I mostly gravitate to whatever’s popular. I don’t know why I just never feel compelled to draw much of any ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
But I thought hard about it and picked out a bunch, in no particular order, that I actively like - as in I’ll give it a like or a reblog - anything else I’m pretty indifferent towards
Under the cut I’ll ramble about each one lol + some extra quick sketches for my favorite ones (warning: it’s long)
Dohko and Shion (old people hard to draw…): Okay this one I love a lot. The scene of their goodbyes in Lost Canvas and the Hades Chapter genuinely stirred my heart and the like, concept of them growing old for 200 years and still being in love… that makes my heart melt…
Shun and Hyoga: There’s a lot about… masculinity in saint seiya that make me roll my eyes, but Shun added a softness to him that I really appreciated
Marin and Shaina: They get so little interaction outside of interacting with Seiya that it’s kinda hard to tell what they’re like… But I really like seeing art of them!
DM and Aphrodite: These two are really fun. Deathmask in particular is just… a really fun character that I totally adore (He’s unapologetically a bad dude and that is very funny to me). There’s a ridiculousness and sweetness to these two that I really like lol, not much more to it! I also like the idea that they both garden together, hence the sketch ^
- Note about Shura: I like stuff with him included too! Especially with DM, however I find it especially difficult to ship him with anyone because of how… wishy-washy he is lol. His level of redeemability in some works makes it seem like he wouldn’t get along well with these two at all sometimes
Seiya and Saori: I have mixed feelings about the ship but the shouting each others names thing is equal parts charming and irritating to me lol
Kanon and Rhadamanthys: This one really comes out of nowhere lol I saw that there was quite a bit of art for it and it just hit different, it’s good stuff
El Cid and Sisyphus: Okay… out of all of these this one is my favorite. I absolutely adored LC and liked the deeper friendship between these two that the anime explored. I really really liked that they traveled together and love the idea that they’re overworked archeology partners (That’s right El Cid has his own notes and theories ) I think it’s very sweet. I actually do wanna draw art for them in the future
Camus and Milo: Epic divorced men… There’s an easy tragedy aspect you can apply to them that I think can be interesting - special shoutout to Kardia and Degel too for being the slightly better version of them lol
If your read this far…. why (and thank you)
