Every time I play a video game or watch an epic anime, it always makes me wish I could live somewhere less boring and mundane. Somewhere I could fight and stand for something. Somewhere true adventure was still possible, in whatever random form it appeared in. Somewhere I could take control of my own life without someone bigger than me lauding my human rights over me, toying with them in their hands. Somewhere I didn’t feel so suffocated…

Then I remember that this world can become like that too.

This is my battle. The reason I fight. To create a world that isn’t suffocating to myself and everyone else who experiences this feeling. To craft and mold a world where people are free to chase after any dream they desire.

And I’ll follow through with that sentiment with my bare hands if I must.

Becausethis, this massive, crazy world right here in front of us, this is our adventure. Each and every struggle we face, big and small, are our quests to complete and main bosses to vanquish. Our victories, both little and grand, are our rewards and levels ups and new achievements unlocked. Each and every skill and asset we get our hands on are our inventory and equipment. And every bit of wisdom we acquire, every lesson we learn from our blunders and our triumphs, are the experience we need to propel us further forward towards our final goals, whatever they may be.

I don’t actually want to run away to some far off fantasy, I truly just want to live.

And that is something I will never stop striving for.

And now I ask you, too, dear reader…

.

.

.

What it is you fight for?

transjon:

you’re a monster; a plague; you defile beautiful things. you’ve even managed to bring history’s greatest pirate to ruin. // you do this, you do. you take the things you love and tear them apart or you pin them down with your body and pretend they’re yours. (x)

disableism:

Two nights ago, someone on a TV show I was watching was tripping on ‘shrooms. I have never done shrooms, but I did get nostalgic for that high where nothing matters, where you feel outside your own body, where everything is light and airy. I wanted what that character felt. Then last night was a rough night. I ended up reading too much about Omicron and the inevitability that “we are all gonna get it ‍♀️”. Except for me, that could very possibly be a death sentence. And my brain spiraled out into existential dread mode & I couldn’t stop it. Today I woke up knowing that I didn’t go for the nostalgic high I wanted and I didn’t treat my overwhelming anxiety with unsanctioned (& way too many) pills. I woke up today knowing I made it through both those feelings without drugs - or at least without non-prescription drugs . I woke up this morning knowing I have been sober for twelve years. #Soberversary

This is America’s day — President Joseph R Biden

disableism:

Pandemic-brain means I have no idea what the date is half the time. Which is how I nearly missed my 11 years sober - today. This last year I’ve said things like, “I can’t believe I’m living through a year like this.” But the fact is I am…living through it. Living to see it. Something I wouldn’t have thought 11 years ago - that I would not only see the year 2021, but see it with my head above the water. Even though I have to be on pain pills again bc of degeneration in my body, I’m being safe & I’m being sane about it. And that’s a strong-man’s (or woman’s, or person’s) feat right there. 2021, I’m here.

I feel like a lot of the ‘whiny shippers’ rhetoric against those of us who are upset is really dismissive of the LGBT+ community & what we deal w in media. & that dismissal by a whole portion of the SPN Family of fans has me pretty depressed, tbh. Most of us didnt expect it to go full-canon or reciprocated. We were happy w 15x18. But when we didn’t get more than a crumb too small for a mouse in the final 2 — not as Misha fans or even Cas fans — but as LGBT+ ppl who’s rep just got killed, when we were put in a corner, once more, like always, by a show that claimed to value us…it hurts. It’s 2020, I’m tired of hurting. Yeah, there is a v small subset of fans who only care about that ship or that actor, but 99% of us who are upset, angry, depressed right now are upset for a whole different reason that hits v close to home for us…for me. Pls, don’t dismiss that. This feels like the straw in a line of decades of other straws, of every show that has ever pulled this shit, that broke the LGBT+ fannish community’s back, you know? It was just one too many for me. (FYI I’m a fan of all 3 characters, all 3 actors & the brother relationship as much as anything else, if you felt you *had* to know that for my pain to be valid.) Anyways thats my piece. SPN Family, pls let us feel our pain w/o mock & dismissal.

Two nights ago, someone on a TV show I was watching was tripping on ‘shrooms. I have never done shrooms, but I did get nostalgic for that high where nothing matters, where you feel outside your own body, where everything is light and airy. I wanted what that character felt. Then last night was a rough night. I ended up reading too much about Omicron and the inevitability that “we are all gonna get it ‍♀️”. Except for me, that could very possibly be a death sentence. And my brain spiraled out into existential dread mode & I couldn’t stop it. Today I woke up knowing that I didn’t go for the nostalgic high I wanted and I didn’t treat my overwhelming anxiety with unsanctioned (& way too many) pills. I woke up today knowing I made it through both those feelings without drugs - or at least without non-prescription drugs . I woke up this morning knowing I have been sober for twelve years. #Soberversary

Just in case

If one day for some reason you find my tumblr… I can explain… Just please let me say what I’ve been wanting to say to you for so long now… -Some0nereally

whatisthenormal:

Knowing that there are so many amazing people who are currently with someone who does not appreciate them for what they’re worth is heartbreaking.

E.G. Especially looking at the person with one you love, knowing you could do better.

Knowing that there are so many amazing people who are currently with someone who does not appreciate them for what they’re worth is heartbreaking.

E.G. Especially looking at the person with one you love, knowing you could do better.

I can’t find it… I think I’ve lost that special place I go to when I want to forget the rest of the world.

E.G. wandering

whatisthenormal:

You make me your last and only come to me when you’re bored of everyone else. And what do I do? My heart jumps, excited that you’re even acknowledging me, and I open my arms to accept you. Every. Single. Time.

E.G. Why do I do this to myself? How do I stop fucking caring about you?

You make me your last and only come to me when you’re bored of everyone else. And what do I do? My heart jumps, excited that you’re even acknowledging me, and I open my arms to accept you. Every. Single. Time.

E.G. Why do I do this to myself? How do I stop fucking caring about you?

whatisthenormal:

I desperately want to believe you…

E.G. /: 6 Word Story

reyturnofbensolo:

Ben…