#physical health
Friendly (and sexy) reminder to take your meds today. Mental and physical health is important.
Also, please talk to someone if you’re feeling suicidal. You’re not alone.
A lot of guys write in asking us what kind of workouts they should do in order to make themselves look more masculine, either to help along the effects of HRT or because they are not on testosterone. Becoming more muscular in general will make your body look more like what society expects for a male if that is your goal, but there are also more targeted workouts you can do to improve specific areas that people are more likely to notice. You’ll want to focus on your upper body both to draw attention away from your hips and because broad shoulders and large arms are considered very masculine. This doesn’t mean you should completely ignore your lower body, it’s healthy to be balanced and you need a strong core and strong legs to hold up the rest of you (and cardio is always good!), but those workouts don’t necessarily do as much as upper body workouts to affect the way your gender is read. Here are a few good upper body workouts (click the links for detailed explanations on how to do the different workouts):
1.Shoulder Press/Overhead Press. You can do these with either dumbbells or a barbell. They’re a great workout for building your core as well as your shoulders, chest, and arms.
2. Dumbbell Shrug. This is a very simple workout and only requires dumbbells. Good for building up your shoulders and upper back.
3.Pushups. These are great because they don’t require any equipment and you can do them anywhere. They work the chest, arms, shoulders, and back.
4.Biceps Curls. Can be done with dumbbells or a barbell. Works your biceps and your forearms.
5. Seated, one-arm dumbbell curls. These isolate your forearms and are an excellent workout (though they may be difficult for beginners).
Many of these can easily be done at home with a limited amount of equipment. If you plan on regularly lifting weights you might want to consider investing in a pair of dumbbells. They are sold at Walmart in various sizes for under 20 dollars a pair. You should choose weights that are difficult for you to lift, but not so heavy that you run the risk of injuring yourself doing basic routines (I started with 15 pound dumbbells, just to give an idea). You probably don’t need to buy any equipment if you have access to a gym and feel comfortable going there to work out, although many trans* guys feel more comfortable working out at home.
Make sure to be very careful when starting a lifting routine, practice good form and even try working out with a buddy who can spot you. You’ll also want to vary your workout routine to challenge yourself and ensure that you don’t plateau. For more information on different workout routines and fitness for trans* guys check out the Beefheads Fitness youtube collab channel.
We’re never going to change anything. There is no point in trying. So the only thing we can do is change ourselves. For better or for worse. Or just for something different.
I just want some fucking drugs, man. Just need to forget the reality of my situation for a while.
I think it’s time to start again.
I had a dream last night that I was with a girl, named Candy (just adding this little detail so I don’t forget later and also because of the girl named Kandie in my head… I don’t want to get them confused), that I knew (I used to smoke crack with her occasionally in the real world). We got some fentanyl from my stepfather (I don’t even have a stepfather) who happened to be a doctor. Candy helped to shoot me up and I wondered later why I didn’t feel anything. Ah, fucking dreams…
When will this end?! Please make it stop! How do I make it stop?!
I wish that I had enough social skills to piss the right people off to get myself murdered.
Pain is distracting. I normally have trouble focusing. Even more so when I’m supposed to be focusing on something I’m not interested in. But as I was in a meeting today, I realized that physical pain and discomfort was what was taking me out of it. Then my mind would quickly wander some place else. Is that a response to pain? Is my mind trying to distract itself in order to avoid the pain?
Something that I think it’s good to know for people who might be wondering whether they have some form of chronic fatigue* or if they’re “just lazy”:
[*Symptom of many different types of physiological illnesses or conditions]
When (currently healthy, only decently stressed) able-bodied people don’t do anything at all for too long, when they rest genuinely too much, they get a sense of being over-charged of energy that they’ve been building up without using, to the point that it’s genuinely annoying and uncomfortable to them, and they feel a very strong need to expend that energy in some activity. I know this because I’ve had that feeling literally once (1) in the last 4 years and it was amazing but also a little exasperating I literally couldn’t stop moving.
(These healthy able-bodied people often will assume that everyone around them feels this way every time they get what looks like decent sleep, so if they see someone who does nothing and yet doesn’t seem to have an impulse to do anything above the barest minimum, they’ll call that laziness instead of pondering the possibility that they’re still tired.)
If you rest, and rest, and rest, and rest, and don’t everliterally feel you’re spilling over energy, there’s an issue. Healthy able-bodied human beings without any particular situation working against them in this sense (a stressful home life, too much work, stressful studies, etc), can and do get enough rest and get extremely tired OF RESTING when it’s been too much. That’s why when they’re in vacations (if they have the money for it) they don’t just sleep in all day until they return to normal activities; they go on tourist attractions, get to know new places, go hiking, go partying, go dancing, and so on.
It’s not normal to rest abundantly and still not feel rested, unless there’s something else going on with you.
5 Grain blend, cucumber, red pepper, tomato, and feta.
Sauce is a bit of olive oil, a bit of feta brine, Greek seasoning, and a touch of lemon pepper.
This recipe was made by a friend of mine over Christmas holiday and I really enjoyed it, so I’m excited to be able to have it for lunch this upcoming week.
Feeling Sick
Chronic nausea is something I have suffered from for about 11 years.
When I stopped being able to breathe, about 6 years ago, I was living in an apartment with two roommates. Over time my ability to…. well breathe was compromised so often that I ended up in the emergency room. Thinking I had developed some sort of lung issue or asthma of some sort I went in thinking I would find out and be cured- only to discover that the truth was I was having such intense panic at all times that my body had gone sort of into shock and wasn’t allowing me to breathe without other (usual) physical or emotional symptoms. The other thing they guessed was some sort of chronic heartburn causing me to be nauseous all the time, yet exacerbated by the stress of the panic.
After a while I got the breathing under control, a symptom that still comes in week or month long waves when my stress and anxiety levels reach their peak, but the nausea and heartburn is something that has always truly escaped me. When I started feeling this way I never thought it would go on for so long, yet looking back, obviously it has.
Being ill is never easy. It took me so long to understand how my body was reacting to my moods, emotions, and especially what I ate.
I do believe for myself everything is such a delicate balance- I walk a tightrope of medication, therapy, and diet to try to keep myself from falling off, but I fall often, and often hard.
Today I feel so incredibly sick. The nausea and bodily discomfort is so horribly intense that I will without a doubt have to sit propped up against a wall of pillows to sleep. I’ll have to make sure I stay far away from trigger foods for quite some time, and really put more work into reminding myself that I don’t like to feel this way.
Tomorrow I go back to work, to work on my art, my apprenticeship, and my career.
One like = one “good luck” for my work week
I just wanted to update since I haven’t posted in about a month.
I’ve improved a lot & I’m expected to make a full recovery within the next few months, according to my PT.
I don’t want to broadcast the specifics of my medical issues for personal reasons, but basically I was having mobility issues & couldn’t get around without great difficulty.
The past month has been really stressful because my family has also been having minor construction done on our home. It’s pretty disturbing having strange men in and out of my house all day when I am home alone & can’t walk or move properly. Pair that with my history of trauma, & I was clearly on edge.
So right now I’m trying to focus entirely on getting better. I’m sorry I didn’t respond to any of the messages I got. Things have just been really overwhelming. But I really appreciate all the kind words, so thank you to those of you who sent them!
Asks are turned off for the time being & I won’t be checking my messages for a while. I’m not ignoring anyone to be mean I’m just dealing with a lot.
Thank you for understanding!
Also, I’d like to remind people again that this isn’t an advice blog. The only advice I give on this blog is in the form of my posts, which are from my own, very specific life experiences. I’m not a therapist. I’m not qualified to be a councilor of any kind. I can hardly handle my own issues, so taking on other people’s problems is not a good idea.
That being said the internet is a big, big place and there are plenty of resources you can go to vent or get advice for free.
I’ve heard 7 Cups of Tea is a good, free place to vent, thought I’ve never used it myself. The listeners are not therapists, so obviously use it at your own risk.
The hardest thing is convincing myself that I don’t own anyone excuses for being unwell, especially myself
This is ‘inspired’* by the most recent example I’ve seen of the following kind of statement. I see this ‘idea’ pop up in my feeds at least 1-2 times a week and it’s sadly misguided. I would like to expand on a twitter rant I had.
* a result of my utter exasperation.
[a screencap of a tweet that reads: mentally ill ppl: i feel horrible parent: “it’s all in your head” physically ill ppl: i feel horrible parent: “let’s get you to the doctor”]
Many people that are physically healthy but have experienced mental health issues (either themselves or of friends or relatives) don’t realize that their experience of mistreatment and stigmatization is actually common for both mental and physical health. I motion that it is actually the norm; especially for young people, and even more so for female (cis or presenting) people. The deeper issue isn’t with how mental health is dealt with compared to physical health it is how both society AND our various health systems just don’t work how we expect them to (and arguably, how they should work).
It’s damn well time we move past the notion that the health system fails mental health but treats physical health with efficacy, dignity and respect. I am so tired of feeling punched down on by seeing this trite and naïve notion stated over and over.
I’ve dealt with both mental and physical health problems since I was a child and in both respects, on many occasions the health systems (British & Canadian) failed me. My parents failed me on both accounts too. Hell, I failed myself until I almost died and learned to self advocate. After a lot of hardwork on my part, I have many diagnoses. I still have no access to effective treatment for the vast majority of those diagnoses. Both my physical and mental health issues are still heavily stigmatized; even by those that mean well. I am entirely traumatized from my life long experience with the system, my family and society. I assure you, my physical diagnoses have received zero special treatment.
Below I’ve inserted my Twitter rant on the subject so it may be a bit disjointed and impassioned (and some redundancy) but there’s also some important points I left out above.
Physically healthy people assume this abt healthcare: 1. Go to doctor, tell them yr symptoms. 2. Doctor listens, believes you & diagnoses >
— cherry, ☃ (@cherryrae) January 15, 2016
3. Dr gives treatment for accurate & thoughtful diagnosis, never questions your motives. 4. You are either cured, symptoms are controlled >
— cherry, ☃ (@cherryrae) January 15, 2016
or you die (as in cancer for example). This is so far from what actually happens it’s not even funny.
— cherry, ☃ (@cherryrae) January 15, 2016
At best this is accurate for common, minor bacterial infections; almost nothing else. Not even common viruses or early caught common cancers
— cherry, ☃ (@cherryrae) January 15, 2016
One major contributing factor to me not getting any physical diagnoses until I almost died was my parent’s, doctors AND my own lack of help.
— cherry, ☃ (@cherryrae) January 15, 2016
however I got many (incorrect) mental health diagnoses by the time I was 22. So, come on. Physical Health is rarely treated how you expect.
— cherry, ☃ (@cherryrae) January 15, 2016
Most especially if you are a young woman. You can’t possibly be physically ill, especially if you have mental health issues (or even don’t!)
— cherry, ☃ (@cherryrae) January 15, 2016
Furthermore, finally getting a diagnosis in my early 30s AFTER I nearly died doesn’t mean I’ll get effective treatment either.
— cherry, ☃ (@cherryrae) January 15, 2016
So, stop comparing! You may be flabbergasted to know there are deep parallels btwn the mistreatment/stigmas of both mental & physical health
— cherry, ☃ (@cherryrae) January 15, 2016
and two from my friend:
@cherryrae my exp with MDs involve coercing them into doing their job. So far, my ailments are minor. can’t imagine if things were worse :/
— Nomi Chi (@nomidraw) January 15, 2016
@cherryrae Srsly. It’s really awful trying to find the right combo of words to get a medical practitioner to fucking believe you/help you.
— Nomi Chi (@nomidraw) January 15, 2016
Let’s support and advocate together for better diagnosis, management, treatment and less stigmatisation of all health issues; mental and physical. Both kinds are appallingly mistreated and misunderstood, comparing the two won’t change anything. Our society and our medical systems fail us on a daily basis, let’s get through this together, not apart. Let’s at least have understanding and compassion for all.
On Physical Health, Emotional Fortitude, and Writing
Currently Listening to:Entropy – End of Silence (feat. Alexa Ray)
I watched the sunrise for the first time in a few years this morning.
The darkest part of night before the dawn. The way the sky turns black-blue and deepens in color. The shadows that grow darker, stiller, and then start to fade as the sun peeks over the horizon. The sky is dyed with a pale purple this morning shot through with…
Every time I tell myself I will do an update more than once every few months, it somehow invokes some variation of Murphy’s Law. Oof.
So there’s been more health nonsense that’s transpired, and it kicked me harder than I anticipated it would. It isn’t COVID-19 related, I’m safe from that for the time being and am actually going to set an appointment to be tested for antibodies here in the next…
I don’t know who needs to hear this, but if the phrase “self care” doesn’t resonate with you, try calling it “system maintenance” and see if that clicks.
Reblogging to add amazing tags from @meta-theory
#this both makes things more fun and also is a really good analogy#because there are four types of system maintenance and that makes the term much more exact than the nebulous “self-care”#and therefore much more helpful to those of us who uhhh struggle with nebulosity#for anyone curious the four types are:#1. corrective (to fix current problems)#2. preventative (to avoid future problems)#3. adaptative (to re-adjust to any changes)#4. perfective (to work towards a better system)#I really like this idea I’m gonna make a checklist