eoki-writing:

Prompt from 11/8/20 - And like the raging ocean, my heart could not be contained.

TW: blood, violence, death

Your skin as fair as summer’s breath, those eyes like dew drops; fresh, bright. The shadow you cast in my doorway at night, as you wake me, drag me into the garden to watch the stars fall. Sundresses, secret smiles, the way you punctuate your sentences with your airy laugh.

Every aspect of you was intoxicating.

Being with you was like walking on air, like flying. You understood me. When we touched, it was electric. But being with you wasn’t enough. It was like an addiction, a craving. You always left me wanting more.

I remember that night, as we lay in the grass watching the tumbling stars streak the sky with light. Your lips, soft as anything, brushed my ear as you whispered. You told me about space, of stars and astrophysics, and all the possibilities that lay out in the void above us.

Each word was a sonnet, your voice a symphony, for me and only me. Only me.

But, then, the stars stilled. You yawned, stretched, and made your leave.

And I was left alone, laying in grass that was now cold without your heat. And once again, I was left wanting more. Needing more.

So the next day, when you visited clutching your wicker basket of muffins, I invited you inside for tea. We sat at the table, across from each other. You wore a strawberry-patterned dress, your hair was carelessly tied back. Beautiful. I couldn’t stop myself from gazing at you, seeing you as only I could.

Sunlight glazed your skin as you spoke, golden rays that shone for you.

It was in that moment I knew that I couldn’t be without you.

So I stood, excusing myself to get a drink from the fridge while you continued to talk, your voice a melody I could hear forever. I turned my back on you, reaching for the cutlery drawer. Silver blades glinted at me, as though daring me, taunting me.

The knife was cold in my hand, but your blood was warm.

In the moments when you drew your final breaths I stared down at the knife, at the scarlet slowly staining your strawberry dress.

A pang of regret, sharp and sour.

What had I done…How could I ruin something so pure, and beautiful? For fear you would leave me?

And now you’ll never leave me. Your skin as fair as summer’s breath, and your eyes of dew will haunt me. Your sundresses, and smiles, and airy laugh will forever torment me.

The silence of your absence will be deafening.

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The thoughts are destroying me, the silence is deadly.

I still feel the pain of how silly it was to think we could stand against time.

In the end I realized you weren’t the one for me, but damn, I really wanted you to be.

I still remember how every time we would look at the stars we’d dream of each other.

She could part oceans in two with her loving nature but there was a devastating loneliness in her eyes when she smiled.

You left in me a painful type of longing that drills a black hole into the soul.

All the breathless moments turned ice cold and with each breath came a thorn in the heart.

You can’t love yourself if you hurt others.

A devastated soul can kill faster than any virus.

You might see the moon with someone else but you’ll never find our exact stars again.

I still see you when my eyes are closed.

It had been a while since I dreamt of you and now I am at the depths of despair missing you.

Pump liquor through your veins love is such a pain.

I loved you with everything I had, it just wasn’t enough.

I know you’ll never love me the way I want you to.

You were always the best mess I knew.

As your agony ended, mine begun.

The countless nights and restless days awaited a fiery woman for battle.

The long lost hours of sleep meant nothing for a precious love, but it lost its shine when you left me in the dark.