#source b99

Zeus: You played me like a fiddle!

Apollo: Oh no, Father. Fiddles are actually quite difficult to play. I played you like the cheap kazoo you are.

Five: Why learn to grow when you can just fix the past? This is exactly why I don’t need therapy

Vanya: That’s not really the lesson I wanted you to take from this

Five: Too late

Five: *shows excellent poker skills*

Klaus: Damn Five. Are you secretly cool?

Five: Well, poker is just math, so I guess it depends on if you consider the mathematician Carl Friedrich cool

Klaus: I do not

Waverly:If I run and leap at Nicole, she will most certainly catch me in her arms

Waverly:Coming in!

Nicole:NO I’M HOLDING COFFEE

Nicole:*drops the coffee to catch Waverly*

narcissa: *holding lucius’ hand over her stomach so he can feel the baby kick* sorry this is taking so long, they kicked for everyone else.

lucius: it’s hard for the little guy to preform under pressure.

snape: top ten things lucius said on his wedding night.

lucius:woah! it was small, but i think i felt something!

regulus: top ten things cissy said on her wedding night.

snape:*laughes*

lucius: stop laughing at it!

snape and regulus: top ten things lucius said on his wedding night!

gigi: i’ve only known amy for two hours but if anything happened to her i would kill everyone in the universe and then myself.

Vlad: I want to show you a picture from last night that really upset me

Danny: Okay, but in my defense, Elle bet me fifty dollars that I couldn’t drink all that shampoo

Vlad: That’s not what I wanted to—

Vlad: You drank SHAMPOO?

Such progression!

Season 1

Season 6

Will: Ladies and gentlemen, we are gathered here today to answer an age-old question. The question is: who here does the best impression of Dr. Hannibal Lecter. You’ll be judged on voice, body language and overall lack of flair. Everyone will perform the same scenario: Dr. Lecter eating a marshmallow for the very first time. LET THE LECTER-OFF BEGIN!

Jack Crawford (impersonating Hannibal): What is this glutinous monstrosity before me?

Beverly (impersonating Hannibal): The sugar in this is quite sweet.

Abigail (impersonating Hannibal): oooohhhh *starts giggling profusely*

Will: That’s your Lecter impression?

Abigail: I can hear him doing that.

Alana (impersonating Hannibal): Looks like a sticky pillow.

Will (impersonating Hannibal): I don’t care for it. Classical music.

*Everybody laughs*

Hannibal (entering the room): What’s going on here? What are you doing?

Will: Dr. Lecter, hey. Nothing, just eating some marshmallows. Care for one?

Hannibal (picking one up): Marshed mellow?

Hannibal: *starts giggling profusely while chewing*

Abigail: I KNEW IT!!!!!!

Wylan: Can you keep a secret?

Kaz: Do you know anything about my life?

Wylan: No, good point.

Peter B Parker: “In light of what you did for me, you can hug me for four to five seconds.”

Miles, super excitedly: “FORTY FIVE SECONDS?!?”

Peter B Parker: “No! Four to five seconds!”

Miles, already hugging him: “Too late!!!”

Miles: “Just be yourself.”

Peter B Parker: “ ‘Be myself’? Miles, I have one day to win MJ over. How long did it take before you guys started liking me?”

Spider-Gwen: “Couple days.”

Noir: “Couple of weeks”

Spider-Ham: “A few months.”

Peni: “Jury’s still out.”

Peter B Parker: “See, Miles?”

Peter B Parker: “'Be myself’. What kind of garbage advice is that?”

Schmidt: We’re so in sync we finish each other’s–

Cece: Sentences

Schmidt: Please, don’t interrupt me

Patton: Just be yourself!

Roman: Be myself? Patton, I have one day to win them over. How long did it take for you guys to like me?

Logan: A couple of weeks.

Virgil: Six months.

Janus: Jury’s still out.

Roman: See? “Be yourself.” What kind of garbage advice is that?

Pansy: Talk to Harry, that’s what real friends do

Draco: Nope. I’m gonna wait till I’m on my deathbed, get the last word in, and then die immediately

Blaise:

Pansy:

Draco:

Blaise:That’s your plan for dealing with this??

Draco: That’s my plan for dealing with everything. I have 77 arguments I’m going to win that way

Nerron: I never understood why people get best friends until I got a best friend myself. This is Will and if anything happened to him, I would kill everyone in this room and then myself.

fangs:if i run and jump at sweet pea, he’ll certainly catch me in his arms

fangs running towards him: COMING IN !!!

sweet pea: NO! IM HOLDING HOT COFFEE-

sweet pea: *drops coffee to catch him* fuck you, fangs.

tony: *glares at steve*

tony: cap…

steve: tony…

peter: peter…

tony:

tony: *whispers* you said your own name, pete

peter: *also whispering* it was the only one left

Ruby: No one would want kale as their last meal. For example, my last meal [pulls out a package from her pocket] is gonna be cookies

Weiss: You just keep those in your pocket?

Ruby: We face death every day. I gotta be prepared to go out on my own terms

Liam: Theo and I kissed

Mason: *screaming* WHAT

Mason: TELL ME EVERYTHING !!!!

Ladybug: Do you want to know how I actually hurt my wrist?

Chat Noir:Yes!

Ladybug: I was hula-hooping. I attend the class for fitness and for fun.

Chat Noir: Oh my god.

Ladybug: I’ve mastered all the moves. The pizza toss, the tornado, the scorpion, the oopsie-doodle.

Chat Noir: Why are you telling me this?

Ladybug: Because know one will ever believe you.

Chat Noir: You sick son of a bi-

Myc:C'mon, Reagan. Brett isn’t going to be a problem.

Myc: You and Brett just need to bone.

Reagan:…

Reagan, angrily: What did you say?

Gigi:No, honey, don’t say it—

Myc, deadpan: I said you two need to bone.

Reagan, angrily and loudy:HoooOOW DARE you, Magic Myc! I am YOUR BOSS!!!

[5 Minutes In]

Reagan, mad and screaming:BONE!!!!

[10 Minutes More]

Reagan, still mad and still screaming: What happens in my bedroom, Myc, is NONE of YOUR business!!

[21 Minutes Passing By, Andre and Glenn Present]

Reagan, still very mad:!BOOOOONE?!?!

[40 Minutes Later, Everyone Present]

Reagan, still evidently mad:Don’tEVER speak to me LIKE THAT again.