it doesn’t matter how obvious i make it

everyone would still pretend they had no idea

jerks.

is there even a single good reason to get up when you can just sleep forever?

—

A storm is happening in my bedroom

She is vicious and violent

Removing her costume,

while the room is silent.

Sometimes you just have to play Bridgit Mendler and romanticize your anxious thoughts

i’m just now realising that there are names for these things i’ve been feeling for years- camhs really is doing something something for me after going through like 3 therapists but if i get one more diagnosis i’m gonna cry

crying in class isnt as bad because my masks wipes my tears for me :)

TW - Suicide mention, self harm mention, eating disorder mention, depression/anxiety mention.

I want opinions off people who don’t know me in real life and therefore can’t be biased, so if you can be bothered then let me know what you think!!!

Question: Is it bad of me to get into a relationship when my mental health is complete and utter trash?

Now when I say this I mean it’s really really bad and like I don’t know if I’ll be alive most days which I think is really unfair on a person I’d be potentially dating. My issue is that I feel like I can’t tell the guy I’m talking to that we should stop before it gets any more serious because I’m mentally unstable, because I feel like it sounds like an excuse? It’s not, it’s literally true but I don’t want him to think I’m backing out for any other reason other than the fact I don’t think it’s fair to make him deal with my bullshit when I don’t even know how to deal with my bullshit? And not just my eating disorder but also my depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts and self harm. It’s all a lot to handle and it’s very bad rn. What do you think? Am I doing the right thing in telling him we can’t be together? Or am I fucking things up for no reason?

Anyone else find that it takes super long for someone from the crisis hotline to text you back, like it’s almost been an hour and idk if it’s worth it

My laughs are empty

My passions are hollow

Longing is the only feeling

It’s like my stomach has a black hole eating up any hope, any light

And my brain is rotting with self hatred

I want it all to stop, the voices, the pain, the betrayal, all of it

Heaven only knows when I’m in hell.

I’ve always been on my own, so if you leave that’s some regular shit.

I overthinking, overlove, overfeel and overstress.

You don’t miss the person, you miss the feeling.

We pretend that we don’t care, but we care.

I get jealous because I know how replaceable I am, I’m nothing special.

You are alone.

It broke my heart but opened my eyes.

As a kid I built a house around my broke heart.

Voices in my head, telling me I’m gonna end up dead.

Never lonely I’m just lowkey.

I guess I’m stressed, I got too much weight up on my chest

I push away the people that I love the most why? I don’t want no one to know I’m vulnerable.

This music’s the only thing keepin’ the peace when I’m fallin’ to pieces.

I used to shine, now I’m all in the dark.

Last year, I felt suicidal. This year, I might do somethin’ different like talkin’ to God more.

If I Jump, living trough these songs. So you know just where to find me

And I ain’t seen a light of day since, well, that’s not important

It’s been long

Told myself it’d get better, no clue what there was next for me.

Don’t cry, it won’t end. Pain will always be my friend.