they say “it was worth the wait”and I mean, yes, absolutely, it is 100% worth the wait, but the fact is, the wait is HARD, and when you’re waiting, you’re not only waiting, you’re worrying hoping that the wait isn’t in vain, and that’s the hard part. its not the time thats hard. its the worry and fear that you’re waiting for something that’ll never happen. if you told someone that 100% they’d find their person by 25, it would be a lot easier. its not the wait thats hard, its the uncertainty, the worry that you’re not good enough, and if you’re not worried about that you’re worried that the kind of person you’re looking for doesn’t exist. that’s what’s hard, and being told, “yeah i waited a long time but it was worth it” doesn’t take away the fear and uncertainty. “well I waited a long time, you’re only…[insert age]” doesn’t help. if it was assured, the wait would be easy. you’d simply fill your life with other stuff and stop worrying about it, always knowing that it’ll be okay. and that’s the best advice i can give to someone who is waiting: live your life as if you’re promised it’ll happen. its better than worrying, and it means you’ll enjoy your singleness, and you’ll be a more interesting person for it.  also, a friend told me: the person you marry has such a big impact on the rest of your life, its too big a thing for God not to be involved. so He will be. you don’t have to be afraid that he won’t be, or that he won’t hear you. and never settle! thats another thing that people say a lot, and let me tell you, it’s true. however: its also overused and cliche and hard to listen to or take seriously. so heres some explanation:

1. if you settle, you’ll always have the nagging feeling of, “what if i’d waited just that little bit longer…"
2. this is literally gluing your life to another person for the rest of your life. you want to be 100% sure. this is the person you’re going to spend the rest of your life with. you GET to be picky
3. dating sucks if it’s the wrong person. you’re constantly worried, disappointed, anxious.
4. the person has to feel right, otherwise you’ll always be dissatisfied and be questioning
5. things can go badly badly wrong if you settle for someone who you deep down know you shouldn’t.
6. “everyone deserves a ‘I didn’t know it could be this good’ kind of love”. settling is NOT that. if you know what you want, then wait for it, otherwise you’ll never be satisfied (especially if you’ve seen it or experienced it before).

Me @ every moment in public.

imsadperiod:

Out of my way. I’ve got exams to deal with.

via@peropoitorni

No really…Im fine

“Hey, are you okay?”

literarymessy:

His hand moves over her hair and he adds:

I love you. I’m not just saying that, I really do.

Her eyes fill up with tears again and she closes them. Even in memory she will find this moment unbearably intense, and she’s aware of this now, while it’s happening. She has never believed herself fit to be loved by any person.

Sally Rooney, Normal People.

Marianne told him this thing about her family. He didn’t know what to say. He started telling her that he loved her. It just happened, like drawing your hand back when you touch something hot. She was crying and everything, and he just said it without thinking. Was it true? He didn’t know enough to know that. At first he thought it must have been true, since he said it, and why would he lie? But then he remembered he does lie sometimes, without planning to or knowing why. It wasn’t the first time he’d had the urge to tell Marianne that he loved her, whether or not it was true, but it was the first time he’d given in and said it.

Sally Rooney, Normal People.

And by now you can only look at me with pity - not with love or friendship but just pity, like I’m something half-dead lying on the roadside and the kindest thing would be to put me out of my misery.

—Sally Rooney, Beautiful World, Where Are You.

His hand moves over her hair and he adds:

I love you. I’m not just saying that, I really do.

Her eyes fill up with tears again and she closes them. Even in memory she will find this moment unbearably intense, and she’s aware of this now, while it’s happening. She has never believed herself fit to be loved by any person.

Sally Rooney, Normal People.

I told him I believed in hell, and that certain people, like me, had to live in hell before they died.

Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar

i’m about to go on anxiety medication in like a week. no idea what the name is yet but does anyone have experience with losing/gaining weight from anxiety based medication??

First impressions just means you have more than one try. Don’t be discouraged.

A storm is happening in my bedroom

She is vicious and violent

Removing her costume,

while the room is silent.

Andere Menschen: Warum geht es dir eigentlich jedes mal so schlecht? Es ist doch nichts, das Leben lohnt sich.

Ich: Weil ich keine Kraft mehr habe, jedes mal so zu tun, als wäre alles okay. Ich kann nicht mehr. Es nimmt mir zu viel Energie.

Its really sweet of her.. I just hate having to make up a new lie every time she asks and it gives me anxiety that she’s going to find out. 

yoursecretsmutblog:

Reasons I can’t talk to attractive guys:

• I’m fucking socially awkward

‍♀️ I hate my life

Sounds familiar

I’m so scared

I am so ugly.

I am so fat.

I disgust myself.

I feel like I can’t stay strong for much longer and that scares me.

what i would give to not be anxious for at least a day..