do people really forget about their problems when they starve themselves?
like ofc it’s a coping mechanism so it helps feel in control despite all the shit in our lives but for me it’s not to the extent where it helps me cope or forget. if anything it causes me more stress. maybe it’s because i’m getting older and the whole honeymoon phase has been over for years or maybe i’m doing it wrong idk anymore
I know I’ve had it before but I’m in a bullimic/anorexic phase at the moment and oatmeal just digest so wellllll. It’s filling and warm and delectable with some Splenda and cinnamon.
I used double the water it calls for and cook it longer and it’s the same taste and texture for double the portion size and the same amount of cals.
I don’t even Want to stop eating to loose weight anymore I’m just tired of feeling controlless and over thinking about food. I’m tired of eating something and right after dictate myself for eating it, or wanting to be different body types nothing like mine every other day. one day my arms are too big, the next day my love handles or too big, the next day my ass is too small. One day I want to work on my muscle and eat protein, then the next day I’m worried if I’m gaining weight cause of the protein, then the next day I want to starve myself then the next day I want to keep my boobs. I’m exhausted. Why can’t I just be enough?
Me: why do you care about changing your body so much, no matter how skinny you get someone else will be smaller and no matter how big your ass gets garentee someone will have a bigger rounder and juicier ass than you
Imagine seeing a real life thinspo girl at a gourmet HAMBURGER joint and by the time you noticed her you were already half way done with your burger. That was my life last night
Me:Okay SOO I’m gonna Eat healthy fats, do squats and work on my curves today
Also me: you just wanna become slim thick like the rest of these Cookie cutter man pleasing insecure girls, you just want an exuse to eat today you dumb b*tch, have some discipline and put the food down
Ana and I have a strange relationship. One day I feel like I should eat avocados only for a week then the next day I’m convinced I don’t need to eat anything because I already ate yesterday.
Wonder what it’s like to be a normal fucking human being
Tumblr: okay incase you forgot, your not very skinny or have femanine curves, so your sort of …. idk…. unattractive? But that’s okay, just be who you are
If you’re in a relationship with a guy and you’re wondering If maybe you’re straight up lesbain isnt it safe to assume you’re probably a suppressed in the closet lesbain? You could Atleast accept the bi sexual label but no you’re wondering if you straight up just want chicks for now on lol
I’m having a meltdown at work, someone please tell me it’s a bad idea to purge 1 fucking cookie after 5 day fast. ALSO IK ALREADY I SHOULDN’T HAVE BROKEN IT WITH A COOKIE
It’s pretty interesting seeing the progression of your eating disorder, and how it fucks you up more and more. The first time I watched To The Bone and there was that scene with Ellen undressed getting weighed, I was like “she looks kinda awful, I’d never want to be that thin”
But now when I rewatch it, it’s just beauty. Perfection
Hey luvs just a reminder if anyone is discouraged; there is literally no reason you won’t get there if you stay consistent. That doesn’t mean fasting for the next 3 months, that just means taking it one day at a time. Even if you’re doing high res
Ik the shake is on the higher cal side, especially for drinks. Ive always said not to drink your calories, but I prefer that than partaking in the consumption of solid foods unless I have to. Vomit </3
Idk if anyone will see this I’m never active anymore lol BUT ANYWAYS I think instead of just perpetually fasting I’m gonna start doing some kinda small omad so I can take my vitamins and not die. Also bc last week I threw up (involuntarily) before class and almost had to miss from fasting so neg :( here’s today’s! Mini cucumber :D
